COB

Ok, I’m still wacko for Flacco. Luckily.

Good to see Gesicki back, targets needed with Chase suspended.

I can’t remember where I read it, but there was a blurb about our defensive drafting. How bad it sucked. Basically our guys all played quarterback. Mike Brown was a quarterback. Zac Taylor was a quarterback. Duke Tobin was a quarterback (go Orlando Predators!), our head of college scouting (also assistant Gm) Mike Potts, was a quarterback. Anyway this thing said our eye for defensive talent walked out the door when Marvin left and these current guys don’t know defense well and can’t evaluate defensive players. They sure can get guys for the offense though.

At the start of a season, Burrow is a notoriously slow starter. We’ll see if his injury was short enough that he’s still in game rhythm. It is possible we get an early season version of Burrow for a couple weeks. Unrelated, but I’m assuming Tinsley is going to go off in this game.

Legendary.

Watching the Texans play the Bills. The Texans defense is amazing. It honestly looks like their starter at every position is noticeably better than our starter at that position. They get to the ball so fast, and they tackle so effectively. Really fun to watch.

With the emphasis on Super Bowls (CR), I’d expect Roger Craig and LC Greenwood to get in. Third one will probably Joe Jacoby. Kenny gets to stare into the abyss.

Zac is in a weird spot. The offense is great, but he’s the head coach. If Zac is responsible for the offense, what does the OC do? And isn’t it Zac’s job to build a defense. Or is the narrrative that he’s a ceo coach who truly doesn’t know defense and leaves it all up to his DC? Because it fits their agenda, I think the Brown family will credit him for the offense, then, even though it is inconsistent and illogical, they’ll absolve him of any responsibility for our horrible defense.

Colts Guy, your happiness is an illusion. As Bengals fans, we know this. First round draft picks are a mirage, glimmering up ahead until you try to focus on them. They disappear. Colts Guy, embrace amorality

Ok let’s hear everyone’s predictions. We are set to have a defense that may go down in history as the worst nfl defense ever. If not the worst, in the bottom 3 or so. I doubt even our chromosome-challenged management can just ride it out. So let’s hear the predictions. Who gets fired. My guess: Golden. He’s had the least amount of time to cultivate political capital within the Bengals front office. Zac will be looked upon as 1. The architect of a still potent offense and 2. A victim of circumstance. Duke is there for life, in my opinion. They’ll put out some bullshit press release about how they’re evaluating the whole draft process, player evaluation, scouting, etc, but they won’t do shit. It’s Mike’s way, win, lose, or draw. More important to do it Mike’s way than anything else. Trust the Mike Brown process (to fail, as it inevitably does).

Never heard of this dude. As I understand it a streamer is a guy who plays video games, puts his picture up in the corner of the video game, talks about what he’s doing and how he’s playing the video game, and other youngsters watch him play the video game.

They already made a big change. Shift4 gang, rise up!

Monday morning meeting in Paycor Stadium: Mike: “it has been reported to me that Duke Tobin has again been quoting Anton Chekov. I’ve warned you Duke, and I don’t want to do this. But harsh consequences are on the horizon for you.” Tobin: “Do you know what punishments I've endured for my crimes, my sins? None. I am proof of the absurdity of men's most treasured abstractions. A just universe wouldn't tolerate my existence.” Mike: “More Chekhov! That’s it! Tobin: “That wasn’t Chekhov, it was Brent Weeks.” Mike: “Brent? The horse jumping instructor at my granddaughter’s stable?” Tobin: “No. Brent Weeks is a philosopher.” Mike: “Blasted! I didn’t want to do this Duke, but you leave me no choice! You no longer have the third parking space from the front. You now have the fifth reserved parking space from the front.” Kellie Ackerman, Corporate Partnership Account Manager: “Oh fuck yes! Movin’ on up!” Tobin: “All that you see will soon perish; those who witness this perishing will soon perish themselves. Die in extreme old age or die before your time – it will all be the same.” Mike: “What?”

Monday morning at Paycor Stadium: Katie: “Duke, we just don’t have the players to win. And I don’t see any avenue to getting those players. We’re fucked.” Tobin: “Maybe I didn’t break it, it just seems like I broke it. Maybe it just seems like we exist at all, and we really aren’t even here. I don’t know anything, no one knows anything.” Katie: “My dad said if you quote Chekhov anymore in the office you were going to be in trouble.”

“This will all blow over. People will forget about it.” - The Guiding Principle that Mike Brown has used to operate the Bengals for the last 34 years.

Correct, he can come back after he misses 4 games.

They’re putting him on IR now, as is customary with our first round draft picks.

I wonder who will be held accountable for the fact that: In the last 4 drafts we’ve had 13 picks in the top 3 rounds. We’ve used 10 of those on defensive players. DJ Turner looks really good. That’s it, that’s all. Murphy is a bust. Zac Carter has already been cut. McKinley Jackson is inactive every week. Battle and CBT, I do not understand what is going on there. Both those guys should be good players. Shemar Stewart has put us all in the position of having to admit that TJ was actually right from day one about a draft pick. /zing! Sorry TJ/ I’m holding out hope for the rookie linebackers because Dick Butkus wouldn’t look all that good playing behind our D line.

https://apple.news/AlohKUH8iTY-AhJYK-Thsdw Jason Williams with an illuminating glimpse into the reality of being the head coach for the Bengals. Essentially, eat a ton of shit so the Brown family can live in an ivory tower.

Our first round draft picks get injured year 1 with an alarming consistency.

The Chiseled Adonis is wearing an orange tie. That is all.

Typical of the Brown family. They’re completely tone deaf. Nice timing. Also, leave it to them to start using a credit card handling service then put out an announcement like it’s some big accomplishment that will somehow make going to a game so much more fun. Kid’s Dad At the Game: “We’ll take two hot dogs and two cokes, thanks.” Kid: “oh my god, Dad! Did they just charge your credit card using Shift4? All the kids at school are talking about Shift4’s integrated commerce solutions! This is the best day ever!”

There is a huge demand for nfl media, ie talk radio, message boards, etc. those guys are just doing their jobs, I don’t hold it against them.

Gosh, Zac’s trying really hard!

Yep Rogers seems to hate it. Kind of tough to figure out why he decided to keep playing.