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Posted
46 minutes ago, ArmyBengal said:

Took my dog outside in the snow this morning and he looked at me like, “What the fuck bro” and decided to shit on the porch.

An allegory for the Bengals entering the start of free agency.

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Posted

I got 2-3 inches now, probably 2-3 more coming. Cold is the big problem. Poor pooch has had one walk this week and the cat is going stir crazy.

Posted
18 hours ago, ArmyBengal said:

Took my dog outside in the snow this morning and he looked at me like, “What the fuck bro” and decided to shit on the porch.

In a related note, it was so fucking cold this morning when I went outside, I accidentally took a shit on the porch…

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Posted
50 minutes ago, COB said:

I’m not buying the “accidental” nature of this incident.

Fine you got me.
I wanted to show the dog what a real man’s shit looked like and marked my territory. Mrs, Armybengal didn’t quite get it and I really lost her smearing it on the door. She was like, “Was that really necessary”?

Yes honey, you clearly don’t understand why the dog is man’s best friend.

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Posted

Just read something at CincyJungle I think talking about how Higgins, Brown and the rest of the offensive guys are all "hyper-focused".  I think that's great, but what else are they going to say?  "2026? Man, we ain't thinking about that shit".

The part I liked the best was:
"Regardless, fans should take note: When both offensive weapons talk about unity and purpose this early, it suggests Cincinnati’s mentality is as formidable as its roster."

Really?  Did this guy not watch the defense last year?  Or maybe Higgins and Brown are going to be two way players next year to help get them back to the post season?  Formidable as it's roster?  Maybe half of it.

Hit the defense in free agency and the draft, get through camp healthy and get back to me on that...

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Posted

I remember back in the 90s every August the papers would print up their Bengals season preview issues, and they would all be filled with "why not us?" "best team ever!" "it's our year" rah-rah BS. Then preseason would start and other teams' backups would be mauling our starters and the post-game articles were litanies of excuses and "just wait until the real thing" BS. Then the season would start and they would suck again and everyone would act all fucking mystified about their suckage. Then in December they would win a couple games and it's "stay the course" "we're on the right track" next year is our year!" BS. Lather, rinse, repeat.

I've been accused of living in the past when it comes to this team. Well, it's hard NOT to live in the past when it just keeps fucking happening again year after year.

I don't want to hear one God damned word about how awesome they're going to be next fall. Shut up and show me.

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Posted

Yes, save all the talk, hype and other bullshit.  I'm now too old to let my emotions run wild with anticipation.

Literally no team, not even the Raiders, will head into the 2026 season saying, "Man we are going to suck".

Take your hype videos and all the talk and shove it up your ass.  It might be more useful there.

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Posted

Even when the mindless offseason puff pieces are actually followed by a good season, it means nothing. The franchise simply cannot sustain success. They never have at any juncture since 1968. Every beautiful summer day just portends a blizzard around the corner.

They have to win it all during their brief little sugar highs, or they never will.

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Posted

It's just like the camp reports and how so and so has been torching players at every turn around.

Yeah, running around in shorts at half speed with no pads.  Amazing.
Nothing gives you a better idea of what week 1 will look like than that.

After free agency and the draft are done for the Bengals, wake me when it's September this year.

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Posted
3 hours ago, ArmyBengal said:

Yes, save all the talk, hype and other bullshit.  I'm now too old to let my emotions run wild with anticipation.

Literally no team, not even the Raiders, will head into the 2026 season saying, "Man we are going to suck".

Take your hype videos and all the talk and shove it up your ass.  It might be more useful there.

It appears you aren’t familiar with P.H.A.T.  
 

It’ll make you a believer!

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Posted
23 minutes ago, COB said:

It appears you aren’t familiar with P.H.A.T.  
 

It’ll make you a believer!

Physical Hungry Accountable Teammate
"Who will give their all to get the job done"?

Still just one of the all time worst things I've ever seen put on a wall to motivate people.
I don't know what's worse.  The saying or the person who is actually motivated by that.

We went from the 80's with posters of half naked chicks to this shit as a motivator.
What the fuck happened?

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Posted

Well for me it's to be the Wake-Me-When-It's-Over Bowl between a team I historically despise and another that I barely acknowledge exists.. I mean yeah, of course I'm pulling for the Seahags, but I couldn't care less for them if they were that strange cylindrical frozen black thing that appeared on my porch this morning

Wait   *looks suspiciously at ArmyBengal* 

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