COB

I can’t wear sweats. But I’ve found myself falling into a pattern. If I buy a pair of pants I like that actually fit, I buy another. End result - right now I have two pairs of pants, but 2 or 3 editions of each. So every day it’s the grey canvas pants I got online, or the tan canvas pants I got at a store called Vance’s. And hooded sweatshirts are a gift from god.

Great Derby, by the way. Really enjoyed it. The Burrow pink suit came down the backstretch in last and stayed in last.

I honestly think I could eat infinite potato cakes.

I’m there. off topic, but in the public interest: if you are anywhere in the vicinity of the Whataburger in DFW when my plane lands in about an hour, best practice would be to just get out of my way.

If the bengals really want to sign him to a long term deal, Myles should absolutely take it. Let’s say 12 million a year for 4 years. 48 million bucks, and the bengals being the Bengals, that is essentially a guaranteed contract. They’ll pay the whole thing out. The alternative? Myles bets on himself and one of two things happen: 1. He reverts to the mean and has to scrounge a deal that will likely have an easy out for the team after two years. 2. He balls out next year, then gets a deal but with only one good year whoever signs him will want escapability. Only Mike Brown will honor the whole contract just based on old fashioned principle. Myles is not that good and he should take a deal with salary commensurate with his middling contributions, but with the one team that will be satisfied with his Count Chocula fueled mediocrity.

We’ve all been slut shamed at some point in our lives, even if it was your own conscience doing the shaming.

He’s got all the incentive in the world to have a monster season and get paid. Here or somewhere else. I’m rooting for him for both selfish and unselfish reasons. It’s hard to envision him having that kind of season though.

We always fall in love with our draft picks after the draft. I read the puff pieces about them, and I fall for it every year. Once they get the pads on and start playing actual football; depression sets in. If I may, I’d like to take this opportunity to personally thank Mike Vrabel and Diana Russini for providing us with one of the most entertaining, though stomach turning, off season stories we’ve had in a long time. Former buckeye Vrabel torched all that OSU good will by playing for the Cheatriots. Nothing against the guy, but he basically looks like a dilapidated garbage truck. Russini is apparently a sexual active young lady who used her feminine wiles to further her journalism career. Her reward has been a slut shaming that rivals anything that went on in Salem, Massachusetts. It’s just a daily reveal of other coaches or league adjacent people that she doinked. I’m just enjoying watching the Patriot Way get exposed for what it is - total bullshit. So thank you, Mike and Diana, the slow motion train wreck that your lives have become are performing a public service - filling in the dead time between the draft and training camp.

A recurring theme popped up in Dehner’s review of Duke’s presser. “Tobin sounded open to restructuring Burrow (different from February response) and said they’d look into it now that the draft was over.” They make statements like this frequently. We can’t do x, y, or z, because we’re busy doing something else. Hire more staff.

Mike: “Heh, heh, arghhhh….” /gurgles, rattles, falls out of Rascal/

lol. He’ll tell them what they want to hear, then skip his first practice.

B+ They theoretically hit their round 1 pick out of the park. If they get 3 or 4 years of Dexter Lawrence at something close to what he was in NY, they killed it. To get that level of player in the draft who contributes that quickly is very unlikely. only downside is we are paying our round 1 guy 25 million a year instead of rookie scale, but hey it’s not my money. I want to win games.

New tight end is projected to be an nfl starter after various development dynamics are implemented (weight training and pharm stuff), OK!!

This dude had some really positive reviews. Mel Kiper had him as the 95th overall player in the draft (5th of available centers). That’s good praise from Mel Kiper Mainway. It’s better than reading something like this stiff shouldn’t even get drafted, etc.

Plays with inside hands and grip strength to latch in, just like my first wife.

Lacks leg drive but is a natural bender. Just like my first wife.

Can play teams if nothing else, better than getting zeroed on a pick of this level which is a real possibility.

I guess A&M ran out of edge rushers for us to draft.

Going to be a lot of tough talking, mean mugging, and owning it.

Enjoyed it. Will subscribe.

Dexter Lawrence is a commercial walk-in freezer. Dude is a mastodon.

Trey is a me first guy. Not a leader in any way, we really hung on to him a couple years too long.

The FA additions and this trade have upgraded the defense to a level that has me actually enthusiastic for the season. As shocked as I was last year when they did absolutely nothing to upgrade our league-worst defense, I’m equally shocked this year by what they’ve done. Kind of the opposite of the nothing from the prior year. Golden has to be thrilled. Our edge rushers have to be thrilled. Looking forward to contending in the AFC North and beating the Steelers twice!

So essentially we are getting Dexter Lawrence for what we would have paid our draft pick? We drafted Dexter Lawrence?

They added one year to his deal? And kept his original money for the first two years? This seems almost too good to be true. We paid 28mm for his third year and didn’t have to give him a raise over what he was making. It’s a huge win for this FO. I’m hard on them because they truly are idiots, but I’ll give them credit on this one.