Return of The Hamburglar?

[Kazkal]

I know. I never understood why the offense gets credit when the defense scores a TD. Or why the defense gets the blame when the offense gives up a score, like a TD or a safety.

Agreed since it kinda messes with both ways...Offense gets credit for something they didn't do & Defense will get a knock on their stats..

Trade it to Dan Snyder for 2 first round picks.

Hell, I'll even throw in Shaun Smith on the deal.

Redskins are picking high this year....

[HoosierCat]

Per Florio, it's a done deal. Ugh.

Shaun Smith will sign with the Bengals

Posted by Mike Florio on December 8, 2009 9:52 PM ET

The OCNN is right again.

Sort of.

Though receiver Chad Ochocinco's Twitter message suggests that defensive tackle Shaun Smith already has re-signed with the Bengals, he hasn't.

But he will.

Per a league source, Smith will sign with the Bengals on Wednesday.

He spent two seasons and part of another with the Bengals, from 2004 and 2006.

We're also told that Smith laid the foundation for his returning by calling coach Marvin Lewis and apologizing for past issues between the two men. We're also told that Smith recently called former Browns G.M. George Kokinis and apologized for the incident that occurred between the two men at a Lions-Brown preseason game, after Smith signed with Detroit after being cut by the Browns.

[ct_bengal]

not of fan of the move but can see it helping the team out, i thought alongside rodgers on the browns that smith was solid. they had to do something with peko out.

[derekshank]

Hmmm, it's oozing puss, bloated, and looks like it's been repeatedly, brutally, driven into the turf.

Hide it before Mike signs it to play d-line for us.

Or before Ben Roethlisberger f**ks it.

*rimshot*

[derekshank]

It's just funny that people can get so upset about something like this that doesn't matter, but then don't care that our offense can't score...something that does matter.

Defense 1st in Scoring with 15.6 points given up

Offense 16th in Scoring with 21.2 Points Scored

Sounds like a winning forumula to me since were 9-3

Actually, I believe that the scoring average you listed is for our entire team, not for our offense. Our defense has scored some TDs, and we have some kick returns too.

Likewise, the points given up is for our entire team. It is NOT how many points our defense has given up. Take away the points that our offense has allowed, such as INTs returned for TDs, and our defense actually gives up less points than that per game.

(Just a little pet peeve of mine. It makes no sense to me why they rank defenses according to how many points they allow per game, and then don't even count how many points the defense has actually allowed. If they want to say the Bengals, as a team, allow a certain amount of points per game, that is fine.

I mean, if we play the Vikings next weeek, and Carson throws 2 picks that get returned for TDs, and Benson fumbles and gets it returned for a TD, all in the first half, are we going to complain about how much our defense sucks because we've given up 21 points in a half? I don't think so.)

Oh Joe. What are we going to do with you? Only you could make a defensive TD seem like a bad thing.

Ok... You're technically correct. Points given up on a pick-6 count against the defense. Likewise, defensive TD's count in the benefit of the offense. But without calculating them in those totals, they become phantom points that are lost in the statistics. But for your benefit, here are the "actual" stats:

The Bengals defense has scored 20 points this season (2 Int's for TD, 1 Fumble recovery for TD... one missed extra point).

The Bengals offense has allowed 14 points (2 Int's for TD)

The Bengals offense is scoring 19.5 points/game. (1.7 points/game fewer)

The Bengals defense is allowing 14.4 points/game. (1.2 points/game fewer)

Feel better now? And with that little stat correction for you... the Bengals are still 9-3. Find something new to bitch about.

[derekshank]

Saw this hadn't been posted yet, per PFT:

We're also told that Smith laid the foundation for his returning by calling coach Marvin Lewis and apologizing for past issues between the two men. We're also told that Smith recently called former Browns G.M. George Kokinis and apologized for the incident that occurred between the two men at a Lions-Brown preseason game, after Smith signed with Detroit after being cut by the Browns.

Translation:

1) Smith heard about Peko's injury and saw Tank Johnson was gimpy.

2) Smith quickly picked up his phone and started making apologies.

3) Mike Brown jizzed in his pants.

[semiotter]

Didn't this guy play for the Lions once?

[gregstephens]

Didn't this guy play for the Lions once?

Well, he SIGNED with them this past pre-season for about three days. I can't verify that he actually PLAYED for them.

[gregstephens]

Jesus

http://twitpic.com/sjuaa

Rub a little dirt on it.

Rub a little butter on it.

Rub a little skin graft on it.

Throw a poncho over it, put a sombrero on it.

Fine it $30,000.

Trade it to Dan Snyder for 2 first round picks.

Hell, I'll even throw in Shaun Smith on the deal.

Register it on Bengalszone and call it MomsLikeMe.

[BlainThePain]

Jesus

http://twitpic.com/sjuaa

Rub a little dirt on it.

Rub a little butter on it.

Rub a little skin graft on it.

Throw a poncho over it, put a sombrero on it.

Fine it $30,000.

Trade it to Dan Snyder for 2 first round picks.

Hell, I'll even throw in Shaun Smith on the deal.

Register it on Bengalszone and call it MomsLikeMe.

Bop it, spin it, flick it, pull it, twist it.

[HairOnFire]

Trade it to Dan Snyder for 2 first round picks.

And speaking of the above, what are the odds I spend some of my free time this offseason pimping the idea of a Chad trade, with his trade return value firmly set, by yours truly, at exactly the same asking price as previously demanded....three years in a row?

[COB]

Moreover, if Smith is signed, I expect that the chance to play for a winning 1st place team will put him on his best behaviour.

Is that all it takes to get Shaun Smith to act like a professional?

All he needs is to be added to a team that has already swept the division, and has only 4 games left that amount to jockeying for position in playoff slotting?

I guess it makes sense, the great Shaun Smith shouldn't have to compete in early season games with the dregs of the league. He shouldn't be expected to behave under normal circumstances, his level of performance demands only the brightest lights, on the biggest stage, under only optimum conditions.

Thank you for considering the Bengals, Shaun Smith. My God, you're actually willing to delay taking the inevitable giant s**t in the face of whoever tries to employ you as a football player as long as you're on a team that has played 75% of its games and is in the top 3 in the conference. Thank you Shaun Smith! Thank you so much!

[semiotter]

It's just funny that people can get so upset about something like this that doesn't matter, but then don't care that our offense can't score...something that does matter.

Defense 1st in Scoring with 15.6 points given up

Offense 16th in Scoring with 21.2 Points Scored

Sounds like a winning forumula to me since were 9-3

Actually, I believe that the scoring average you listed is for our entire team, not for our offense. Our defense has scored some TDs, and we have some kick returns too.

Likewise, the points given up is for our entire team. It is NOT how many points our defense has given up. Take away the points that our offense has allowed, such as INTs returned for TDs, and our defense actually gives up less points than that per game.

(Just a little pet peeve of mine. It makes no sense to me why they rank defenses according to how many points they allow per game, and then don't even count how many points the defense has actually allowed. If they want to say the Bengals, as a team, allow a certain amount of points per game, that is fine.

I mean, if we play the Vikings next weeek, and Carson throws 2 picks that get returned for TDs, and Benson fumbles and gets it returned for a TD, all in the first half, are we going to complain about how much our defense sucks because we've given up 21 points in a half? I don't think so.)

I wish I could put on here what I'm thinging when I read Joe P's broken record BS about the offense. 9-3 record great year, but its the offense. Great year on defense, but its the offense. Sweep the Div 6-0, but its the offense. Great shot at getting a bye week in the playoffs, but its the offense!! But its the Offense

[jjakq27]

Three problems with this:

1. He's a douche.

2. He's never played for Zim.

3. He sucks!! He couldn't stay with the two worst teams in the league and now he's on a playoff contender??!

Did I mention he's also a douche?

After listening to Dave Lapham on the Bengals Roundtable radio show this evening, I feel a little better about bringing him back.

First, apparently Smith actually is familiar with Zim's schemes since he was on Dallas' practice squad in 2003. And secondly, he mentioned to Lap that he noticed a big difference in the locker room upon his return. No more of the "me, me, me" stuff which was prevalent when he was with the team a few years back. Lap thought that spoke volumes about how things have changed in that time. Hopefully he will take advantage of his new surroundings and prosper with his second chance here.

[Pidge]

That's all very nice but unless his fitness and talent levels have increased, I'm not holding out much hope he'll play a pivotal role in keeping this thing going forward.

[HairOnFire]

A pivotal role?

They needed a fat guy to reduce the number of snaps Sims and Tank play. End of story.

[Pidge]

A pivotal role?

They needed a fat guy to reduce the number of snaps Sims and Tank play. End of story.

I agree. He's a big body, unlike Harris. He's filling in, that's all. He's not going to replace Peko's production. The other DTs will have to do that.

[HairOnFire]

A pivotal role?

They needed a fat guy to reduce the number of snaps Sims and Tank play. End of story.

I agree. He's a big body, unlike Harris. He's filling in, that's all. He's not going to replace Peko's production. The other DTs will have to do that.

I don't know where the production will come from, but prior to Peko's injury Pat Sims and Tank Johnson were getting no more than a dozen snaps a game. Now, I'm guessing each of their respective workloads just doubled, not good news when you consider how Tank has been fighting a foot problem all season. So if Shawn Smith manages to clog the middle in the same manner Peko was doing I don't think his individual production will matter much.

BTW, I've apparently forgotten why Smith is called Hamburglar? Is it just because he's a fat tub of goo OR is there something more?

[TJJackson]

BTW, I've apparently forgotten why Smith is called Hamburglar? Is it just because he's a fat tub of goo OR is there something more?

One game while he was a Saint, he and another player were inactive, and during the game made their way to the press box and gorged themselves on the hamburgers there. This is apparently not within the rules of things an player can do on game day, even when inactive. He was released a few days later, and the head coach indicated the Hamburglar incident was one of the primary reasons for his release.

I guess he was the ringleader and the other player just tagged along, as only he was forever after called the Hamburglar.

[jonahdsage]

BTW, I've apparently forgotten why Smith is called Hamburglar? Is it just because he's a fat tub of goo OR is there something more?

One game while he was a Saint, he and another player were inactive, and during the game made their way to the press box and gorged themselves on the hamburgers there. This is apparently not within the rules of things an player can do on game day, even when inactive. He was released a few days later, and the head coach indicated the Hamburglar incident was one of the primary reasons for his release.

I guess he was the ringleader and the other player just tagged along, as only he was forever after called the Hamburglar.

Peterson didn't practice yesterday and may not go today with a foot/ankle injury. Seems like Minn has been bitten by the injury bug. They will likely be missing their starting RT, too. That being said -- if Peko will be ready for the Jets, we have to make smith work for an injured Minnesota running game and a home game against the chiefs. Certainly having smith in isn't ideal, but I think he will be serviceable for what we need over the next few games.

[HairOnFire]

I guess he was the ringleader and the other player just tagged along, as only he was forever after called the Hamburglar.

Well, thanks for the reminder, Sweetie.

I had forgotten the story, and no doubt will again, due to the unremarkable circumstances involved.

Hamburglar it is.

[TJJackson]

due to the unremarkable circumstances

That, and the ganja

[HairOnFire]

due to the unremarkable circumstances

That, and the ganja

Thank you, I don't mind if I do.

[snap]

Wow, nice bud....this Diablo. Very smooth yet very stoney. My only complaint is the more I smoke of this stuff the dumber I seem to get.

In fact, two more hits of this stuff and I'll probably want my own practice bubble.

Or maybe a ham sandwhich.

[COB]

Wow, nice bud....this Diablo. Very smooth yet very stoney.

You're all hopped up on reefers, is that it?

[kingwilly]

BTW, I've apparently forgotten why Smith is called Hamburglar? Is it just because he's a fat tub of goo OR is there something more?

One game while he was a Saint, he and another player were inactive, and during the game made their way to the press box and gorged themselves on the hamburgers there. This is apparently not within the rules of things an player can do on game day, even when inactive. He was released a few days later, and the head coach indicated the Hamburglar incident was one of the primary reasons for his release.

I guess he was the ringleader and the other player just tagged along, as only he was forever after called the Hamburglar.

Peterson didn't practice yesterday and may not go today with a foot/ankle injury. Seems like Minn has been bitten by the injury bug. They will likely be missing their starting RT, too. That being said -- if Peko will be ready for the Jets, we have to make smith work for an injured Minnesota running game and a home game against the chiefs. Certainly having smith in isn't ideal, but I think he will be serviceable for what we need over the next few games.

I think he plays very little, and we'll see more of harris, who bumps up into the rotation.

Tank - Sims - Harris

With Fanene/Rucker/Johnson/Geathers

Smith is the guy who spells Tank or Sims.