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Mike Brown Thought of the Day

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On 4/25/2018 at 6:44 AM, TJJackson said:

A high water mark, for certain. 

Let's commit to some glory day Sundays this fall, everyone shit posting the play by play. Any takers? 

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Even though the link was dead, I just plain like the sound of it.  Count me in.  Roethlisberger is a first grade tool.  

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Splack!   (Dentures fly across the breakfast table)

Pumpkin!  Who the hell is Geno Atkins!? 25 million ?  Is there an extra zero?  Get that good for nothin, greenie wild boy of yours Troy in here.  And pick up my teeth will you Pumpkin Snoogles?

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Splack!   (Dentures fly across the breakfast table)

"Hue Jackson fired?  By gum, I know that name from somewhere!  My tight end at Dartmouth?  My great granddaughter's dressage coach?  The old Gatorade rep who used to call on us at PBS and was running a dice game on concourse C during games?  Was Hue Jackson the name of the neighbor's Spaniel when I was a boy back in the '40s?"  Prolific grunting while adjusting buckles and straps on circa 1963 truss  "Hue Jackson, Hue Jackson, is that a pudding pop flavor I used to buy for the boys at the A&P?  Is Hue Jackson my address?  My name?  An offering on the early bird menu at Frisch's?  I remember!  Hue Jackson is a play dad used to call back in Massillon!  4th and 1 on their 30, call the old Hue Jackson!  Works every time!" Coughing fit strikes, collapses on the davenport. 

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Hue Jackson over that only winning three games in that era will never be hired as a head coach. As far as anybody is concerned.

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On 10/30/2018 at 8:46 PM, Passepartout said:

Hue Jackson over that only winning three games in that era will never be hired as a head coach. As far as anybody is concerned.

Yeah he's done as a HC.  UNLESS...Marvin brings him back here, retires after the season, and has MB hire him as the new HC.  Don't be surprised.

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45 minutes ago, ShulaSteakhouse said:

Yeah he's done as a HC.  UNLESS...Marvin brings him back here, retires after the season, and has MB hire him as the new HC.  Don't be surprised.

Bringing Marvin Lewis back as HC blew me out off the water, so yeah. Nothing would surprise me now.

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Splack!   (Dentures fly across the dashboard of stock 1975 Ford Grenada)

”By gum!  Is this the Ronald Reagan?  It is!  Thank God, getting confusing with all these new roads out here,”

continues driving 15 miles per hour on random residential street in 7 Hills with left blinker on

 

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“By god, a man’s just not dressed without sock garters!”

Shakes fist at uncaring universe.

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"What was this trade deadline thing I heard about recently"?
"Did I miss an opportunity to increase my stock in Werther's again"?
"There's just something about those hard candies that makes me.... Hey I forgot to write a check to the icebox repair man".

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Splack!   (Dentures fly across the breakfast table)

 

"Dierdre, take a letter."  Begins dictating:

 

"Dear Ken Petet,

Good morning Ken, hope all's well well with your mother.  As you know, your little act where you tie those monkeys to the backs of dogs and let them run around on our football field is about the best entertainment we've had at halftime since we used to spend big money to get Up With People in here back in '68.  

I've got a proposition I think you're going to like.  It just so happens our fans love a good ol' tug of war.  This has been demonstrated, and it's an undeniable fact.  

Now listen here, you duct tape those monkeys hands to the end of a rope, and put the dogs on the other end.  Won't need to train the dogs, they just love to pull a rope naturally.  My brother Pete had his shoulder dislocated by my dad's dachshund some years back.  Wasn't a miniature dachshund, just a regular one.  That dog just loved to pull a rope.

Anyway, my crowd would love it.  Tape the monkeys to one end, let the dogs drag them around the field by the other end of the rope, we'll play some circus sounding music, we almost can't miss with this one.

I know what you're thinking, 'where am I going to find a legitimate tug of war rope?'  Just so happens I've got one.  And here's where it gets interesting.  You take this show on the road with you, I lease you the rope.  Either a flat fee, or I take a percentage, doesn't really matter to me.  Of course, we fold the performance at our place into the lease contract.  I'll pay you a small fee, like a hundred bucks.  You use our rope, see how successful the act is, then take it out on the county fair and minor league baseball circuit.  

Let me know when we can get going on this one.  My fans can't wait to see your new dog monkey tug of war Extravaganza!

Truly yours,

Mike Brown"

"Dierdre, did you get all that?"

 

Caregiver from At Home Instead says, "Mr. Brown, we're at your breakfast table.  We don't go into your office until 11 today.  Do you want your other slippers?"

 

 

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5 hours ago, COB said:

Splack!   (Dentures fly across the breakfast table)

 

"Dierdre, take a letter."  Begins dictating:

 

"Dear Ken Petet,

Good morning Ken, hope all's well well with your mother.  As you know, your little act where you tie those monkeys to the backs of dogs and let them run around on our football field is about the best entertainment we've had at halftime since we used to spend big money to get Up With People in here back in '68.  

I've got a proposition I think you're going to like.  It just so happens our fans love a good ol' tug of war.  This has been demonstrated, and it's an undeniable fact.  

Now listen here, you duct tape those monkeys hands to the end of a rope, and put the dogs on the other end.  Won't need to train the dogs, they just love to pull a rope naturally.  My brother Pete had his shoulder dislocated by my dad's dachshund some years back.  Wasn't a miniature dachshund, just a regular one.  That dog just loved to pull a rope.

Anyway, my crowd would love it.  Tape the monkeys to one end, let the dogs drag them around the field by the other end of the rope, we'll play some circus sounding music, we almost can't miss with this one.

I know what you're thinking, 'where am I going to find a legitimate tug of war rope?'  Just so happens I've got one.  And here's where it gets interesting.  You take this show on the road with you, I lease you the rope.  Either a flat fee, or I take a percentage, doesn't really matter to me.  Of course, we fold the performance at our place into the lease contract.  I'll pay you a small fee, like a hundred bucks.  You use our rope, see how successful the act is, then take it out on the county fair and minor league baseball circuit.  

Let me know when we can get going on this one.  My fans can't wait to see your new dog monkey tug of war Extravaganza!

Truly yours,

Mike Brown"

"Dierdre, did you get all that?"

 

Caregiver from At Home Instead says, "Mr. Brown, we're at your breakfast table.  We don't go into your office until 11 today.  Do you want your other slippers?"

 

 

Hahaha great timing at the end COB

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Hobson's already hard at work whittling this down to $4 mil to re-sign FA's.  Also, with the exception of I think 3 teams, that's pretty much a list of the worst teams in the league.  Funny how that works.

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