gregstephens Posted October 3, 2008 Report Share Posted October 3, 2008 Not because I am a negative person, but thanks to preyer's suggestion on another thread, I'd like to start the 'Ryan Fitzpatrick epitaph' contest. Assuming he plays Sunday, and I'll be shocked if he doesn't, how does the epitaph read after Sunday's game? Winner gets a date with Billy's signature hottie (jk). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spor_tees Posted October 3, 2008 Report Share Posted October 3, 2008 Here lies Ryan Fitzpatrick...despite a Harvard education, he still wasn't smart enough to avoid playing for Mike Brown. A beautiful mind is a terrible thing to waste. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gregstephens Posted October 3, 2008 Author Report Share Posted October 3, 2008 Here Lies Ryan Fitzpatrick...who'd like to thank his five pall-bearers for putting him here in the first place. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
COB Posted October 3, 2008 Report Share Posted October 3, 2008 "Here lies Ryan Fitzpatrick. Levi Jones is just now beginning to turn outside to engage the Defensive End." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoosierCat Posted October 3, 2008 Report Share Posted October 3, 2008 RYAN FITZPATRICKNovember 24, 1982 - October 5, 2008Tragically crushed to death by Eric Ghaicuic, who tripped over his own two feet and inadvertently pancaked himself onto Fitz during the post-game celebration of the Bengals 28-27 upset win against Dallas. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spor_tees Posted October 3, 2008 Report Share Posted October 3, 2008 "Here lies Ryan Fitzpatrick...Fitzpatrick died today from a sexually transmitted disease he received from his center, Eric Ghiacic who also has now passed. It is believed Fitzpatrick obtained the disease after Ghiacic was repeatedly knocked back into Fitzpatrick by defensive tackles. On his death bed, Fitzpatrick told family members, "I didn't even know I was even gay...and make sure you sue the hell out of Under Armor, because that cup didn't protect me at all!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DesperateDerelict Posted October 3, 2008 Report Share Posted October 3, 2008 There once was a Bengal named RyanA forward pass he'd been tryin'When his body was wrecked(You could say "Guy-checked")Now it's Palmer's turn to be cryin'. ----- or -----Fitzgerald was their quarterbackWhen they faced the Dallas attackA great mind he hadhis arm wasn't badIt was an O-Line that he lacked(or.. He died on their tenth sack) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GregCook Posted October 3, 2008 Report Share Posted October 3, 2008 RIP Ryan Fitzpatrick, the Mick from the Crimson yard of Cambridge, he played some ball in the Fall, struggled with the ball and was carried off the hallowed Dallas yard, dripping Crimson from giving his all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scottishbengal Posted October 3, 2008 Report Share Posted October 3, 2008 Here Lies Ryan Fitzpatrick - he was killed in Dallas today when his brain was knocked out of his skull by an unblocked linebacker who came from behind a grassy knoll. Or it could have been through a sponge of an O-line. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DesperateDerelict Posted October 3, 2008 Report Share Posted October 3, 2008 Here lies Ryan Fitzgeral'Little did he no his perilThey say he was smartfrom this earth he did part'cause Mike Brown is a freaking idiot. What??? You want rhymes??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jonahdsage Posted October 4, 2008 Report Share Posted October 4, 2008 Fitzgerald tried hardTo make it rain in texasHe was sacked to deathhaiku anyone? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BengalszoneBilly Posted October 4, 2008 Report Share Posted October 4, 2008 There once was a Bengal named RyanA forward pass he'd been tryin'When his body was wrecked(You could say "Guy-checked")Now it's Palmer's turn to be cryin'. ----- or -----Fitzgerald was their quarterbackWhen they faced the Dallas attackA great mind he hadhis arm wasn't badIt was an O-Line that he lacked(or.. He died on their tenth sack)Excellent. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DesperateDerelict Posted October 4, 2008 Report Share Posted October 4, 2008 There once was a Bengal named RyanA forward pass he'd been tryin'When his body was wrecked(You could say "Guy-checked")Now it's Palmer's turn to be cryin'. ----- or -----Fitzgerald was their quarterbackWhen they faced the Dallas attackA great mind he hadhis arm wasn't badIt was an O-Line that he lacked(or.. He died on their tenth sack)Excellent.Winner gets a date with Billy's signature hottie (jk). Do I win??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DelhiBengal Posted October 5, 2008 Report Share Posted October 5, 2008 Here Lies Ryan Fitzpatrick...his deep ball looked like a punt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gregstephens Posted October 6, 2008 Author Report Share Posted October 6, 2008 Here lies Ryan Fitzpatrick...thank God I didn't have to play Dallas. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spor_tees Posted October 7, 2008 Report Share Posted October 7, 2008 Here lies Ryan Fitzpatrick, "I told you we would be the Cowboys...."Just a little Norm MacDonald type comedy there for ya. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BengalPimp Posted October 8, 2008 Report Share Posted October 8, 2008 Here lies Ryan Fitzgeral'Little did he no his perilThey say he was smartfrom this earth he did part'cause Mike Brown is a freaking idiot. What??? You want rhymes???Uh, Fitzpatrick...........Fitzgerald is our LB's Coach. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DesperateDerelict Posted October 8, 2008 Report Share Posted October 8, 2008 Here lies Ryan Fitzgeral'Little did he no his perilThey say he was smartfrom this earth he did part'cause Mike Brown is a freaking idiot. What??? You want rhymes???Uh, Fitzpatrick...........Fitzgerald is our LB's Coach.yeah....but it doesn't rhyme Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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