Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
HairOnFire

The funniest thing I've heard in weeks....

Recommended Posts

Would you care to provide a link that details this?

I doubt such a link exists, but if you're interested you could drop by his blog and ask Doc about his cracker eating habits. Maybe something along the lines of.....

"Dear sir, it has recently come to my attention that you may prefer crackers that are dick-shaped. While this strikes me as being a tad peculiar I refuse to cast judgement upon you until more facts are known. Do you only eat dick-shaped crackers? Have you never tried a classic saltine or he buttery goodness of a Ritz? And most important, were I of a mind to try said cracker for myself where might I sample one of these edible dick-shaped treats? The reason I ask is due to my own fondness for any quality cracker product, as well as my years and years of experience with having things that are dick-shaped placed in the vicinity of my mouth. Thanks in advance, your biggest and perhaps only fan, TJ "Sweetie" Jackson"

Sorry if I'm the only one that found this horribly amusing !!!

:lol::lol::lol:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well, I guess the only one who believes that he (or anyone) eats such crackers and that he is "best known" for doing so.......would be you, Hair

Then again, this is hardly the first time that you have been alone in holding a given opinion

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
daugherty, in a moment of refreshing honesty, wrote:

Best wishes to Lance McAlister. He is a pro. He owns the passion for sports that I've never been able to summon on a daily basis. Lance knows what he knows. He'll do very well.

And, that bolded part, right there? THAT is why his talk show sucked. And why his column sucks. And why he, in general, sucks. Pretty damn hard to write an effective and insightful column, much less host an interesting sports talk show, when you really don't care about the subject matter.

Problem is, the just (C. Trent) were caught up with the unjust (Daugherty) in this latest purge. But Daugherty's canning was uber-deserved.

I think Doc reflects the frustration and occasional apathy felt by any Cincinnati sports fan even remotely sober and paying attention.

Basically, I like the honesty. You people want a writer who will tell you its raining while Mike Brown pisses down your neck. That's fine, but you won't get that either. Yep, now we get to hear even more about the Yankees and Red Sox! That's much better... :rolleyes:

Seriously though...the hatred some of you obviously have for PD. You need to direct that where it belongs. PD doesn't make the turds, he just writes about the turds.

I find him quite positive about the Reds, and quite apathetic about the Bengals. I can relate. I'm just glad they didn't replace him with some homer. Even though I'm sure that's what many here were hoping for. But hey, at least you'll know how the BoSox did last night.

Get used to this:

1098948157_7561.jpg

f**k him and his apathy. He doesn't have "passion" for what he is doing? It shows. It reflects all over his piece of s**t tired, boring, stale, and generally fail-worthy columns. There are oodles of columnists, toiling away in cities with less than wonderful teams, who are interesting to read. He ain't one of them. It's pretty f**kin' weak sauce to blame Paul Daugherty's failings on the Bengals and Reds (don't fool yourself, his Reds stuff is equally as s**tacular as his Bengals stuff) . REAL weak sauce. Try again.

Franky, your entire argument blows. What does Daugherty being a lazy, ineffectual, boring, and generally mail-it-in thinker have to do with Jimmy Fallon? Or being a "homer"? If anything, the bengals' 17-year run of abject failure would have inspired any of a number of columnists to creative goodness. Not Daugherty. That's asking way too much. With so much rich material to work with locally, given the Reds' and Bengals' general incompetence, he has been a continuing abject failure, comfortable collecting his check rather than bringing insight into the situation. He is as whiny whinerson in his approach as too many on here. The firing from WLW was overdue.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

TJ Simers of the LA Times would have been like a cat with catnip writing about the Bengals and Reds.

Mike Bianchi in the Orlando Sentinel. About four of the various NY columinsts.

Michael Wilbon.

That's just off the top of my head. NOT ONE of those are "homers". But they ARE interesting. That's too much to ask of Daugherty. I have no clue why anyone would try and apologize for his lazy stylings. That's a true mystery to me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Well, I guess the only one who believes that he (or anyone) eats such crackers and that he is "best known" for doing so.......would be you, Hair

Well, you never know. It's possible it was all just a joke not intended to be taken seriously. Then again, my insider sources have confirmed once again that Paul Daugherty does indeed eat dick-shaped crackers. So at some point we're all going to come to grips with that fact and decide for ourselves how it makes us feel.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
daugherty, in a moment of refreshing honesty, wrote:

Best wishes to Lance McAlister. He is a pro. He owns the passion for sports that I've never been able to summon on a daily basis. Lance knows what he knows. He'll do very well.

And, that bolded part, right there? THAT is why his talk show sucked. And why his column sucks. And why he, in general, sucks. Pretty damn hard to write an effective and insightful column, much less host an interesting sports talk show, when you really don't care about the subject matter.

Problem is, the just (C. Trent) were caught up with the unjust (Daugherty) in this latest purge. But Daugherty's canning was uber-deserved.

I think Doc reflects the frustration and occasional apathy felt by any Cincinnati sports fan even remotely sober and paying attention.

Basically, I like the honesty. You people want a writer who will tell you its raining while Mike Brown pisses down your neck. That's fine, but you won't get that either. Yep, now we get to hear even more about the Yankees and Red Sox! That's much better... :rolleyes:

Seriously though...the hatred some of you obviously have for PD. You need to direct that where it belongs. PD doesn't make the turds, he just writes about the turds.

I find him quite positive about the Reds, and quite apathetic about the Bengals. I can relate. I'm just glad they didn't replace him with some homer. Even though I'm sure that's what many here were hoping for. But hey, at least you'll know how the BoSox did last night.

Get used to this:

1098948157_7561.jpg

f**k him and his apathy. He doesn't have "passion" for what he is doing? It shows. It reflects all over his piece of s**t tired, boring, stale, and generally fail-worthy columns. There are oodles of columnists, toiling away in cities with less than wonderful teams, who are interesting to read. He ain't one of them. It's pretty f**kin' weak sauce to blame Paul Daugherty's failings on the Bengals and Reds (don't fool yourself, his Reds stuff is equally as s**tacular as his Bengals stuff) . REAL weak sauce. Try again.

Franky, your entire argument blows. What does Daugherty being a lazy, ineffectual, boring, and generally mail-it-in thinker have to do with Jimmy Fallon? Or being a "homer"? If anything, the bengals' 17-year run of abject failure would have inspired any of a number of columnists to creative goodness. Not Daugherty. That's asking way too much. With so much rich material to work with locally, given the Reds' and Bengals' general incompetence, he has been a continuing abject failure, comfortable collecting his check rather than bringing insight into the situation. He is as whiny whinerson in his approach as too many on here. The firing from WLW was overdue.

Frankly, I couldn't care less about his apathy!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Well, I guess the only one who believes that he (or anyone) eats such crackers and that he is "best known" for doing so.......would be you, Hair

Well, you never know. It's possible it was all just a joke not intended to be taken seriously. Then again, my insider sources have confirmed once again that Paul Daugherty does indeed eat dick-shaped crackers. So at some point we're all going to come to grips with that fact and decide for ourselves how it makes us feel.

Well, your "inside source" has failed to reveal this "true fact" to anyone other than you

As a result, the "true fact" is highly in doubt, and more importantly, it means that the person in question is not "best known" for this fact. In fact, given that the "fact" is not known, the person is not known for this by anyone

Except you.

Despite your every-other-posting attempt to MAKE it known, even as you offer no proof whatsoever

Maybe you can get a job with Florio - you and he have a lot in common

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
So at some point we're all going to come to grips with that fact and decide for ourselves how it makes us feel.

Makes me feel like I'm wasting time reading this.

Well who knew it's even possible for guys like you to waste time? Shouldn't you be feeding your cat or telling all of your friends at the home about the day you met Harry Truman?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Look there's a perfect solution to all out problems.

First, it appears that www.dickshapedcrackers.com is available.

No worse name for a sports blog than any other, right?

So, someone pony up a few nickels to godaddy, grab the domain, throw up a basic site, and let all the Doc critics show us what real sportz juurnalizm in Cincy ought to look like.

QED, right?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
First, it appears that www.dickshapedcrackers.com is available. No worse name for a sports blog than any other, right?

That is so true. I've even heard of a sports blog, Stripehype, apparently named after a unique line of striped womens leggings and garters. How crazy is that?

So, someone pony up a few nickels to godaddy, grab the domain, throw up a basic site, and let all the Doc critics show us what real sportz juurnalizm in Cincy ought to look like.

Not a chance. I detest bloggers.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
First, it appears that www.dickshapedcrackers.com is available. No worse name for a sports blog than any other, right?

That is so true. I've even heard of a sports blog, Stripehype, apparently named after a unique line of striped womens leggings and garters. How crazy is that?

Funny you should mention lower legwear. You ought to check out the hype just now...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I guess we're never gonna see that proof

Is it against the board rules to call a fellow member "a lying sack of crap"?

Let's find out.

TJ Jackson is lying sack of crap.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Well who knew it's even possible for guys like you to waste time? Shouldn't you be feeding your cat or telling all of your friends at the home about the day you met Harry Truman?

Is this one of your many faux funny personas? You ain't makin' it as a comic...just another dickshapedcracker.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Is this one of your many faux funny personas? You ain't makin' it as a comic...just another dickshapedcracker.

I'm not a comic. I'm a mesage board plinker currently making fun of how your dumb ass read at least 30 posts before you figured out whether or not you were wasting your time. Couldn't you figure things out after the very first post? Or after a dozen? So why waste your precious time trolling through 30 posts before telling everyone how little you care? If you've got nothing to add, serious or joking, why not keep your mouth shut?

BTW, there are two threads devoted to this topic on Go-Bengals with a combined post total that tops 100. Perhaps you should go back to that board and promptly tell everyone there what a complete waste of your time it is.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I guess we're never gonna see that proof

Is it against the board rules to call a fellow member "a lying sack of crap"?

Why in the f**k would you think that Hair literally meant Daugherty eats dick-shaped crackers? Jeebus, TJ, you are not that dense.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

First things first.....I'm still laughing.

However, it's interesting how much anger some of you have shown in this thread. Is it possible that some of you still like and respect Paul Daugherty despite the rather widespread belief that he's nothing more than a lazy hack?

The reason I ask is due to my recent visit to the WhoDeyRevolution website. In that wretched place Daugherty's firing is being looked upon as a minor tragedy, and some posters have even gone so far as to suggest the evil overlord, Mike Brown, was behind the move.

Please let this be true.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
If you've got nothing to add, serious or joking, why not keep your mouth shut?

It seems telling that you react in such a condescending manner to an innocuous, benign comment that perhaps was only funny to me.

Crissakes, if I were to fire off some douchebag condescending BS your way every time I read something of your's that wasn't funny...

We'd be fighting all the time.

Instead, I'll try and not intrude on any of your many personal blather-fests.

My bad

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Why in the f**k would you think that Hair literally meant Daugherty eats dick-shaped crackers? Jeebus, TJ, you are not that dense.

Of course he is.

And he's also a lying sack of crap.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Funny you should mention lower legwear. You ought to check out the hype just now...

I just checked it out. Instead of those pants, Chad should just wear a sign that says, "Pay attention to me. Please. I'm begging you."

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Crissakes, if I were to fire off some douchebag condescending BS your way every time I read something of your's that wasn't funny...We'd be fighting all the time.

This may come as a shock to you but I wouldn't mind that a bit.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
First things first.....I'm still laughing.

Thats because you are a douchebag. I doubt even you would dispute this. I'm sure you came to terms with your douchebaggery years ago.

However, it's interesting how much anger some of you have shown in this thread. Is it possible that some of you still like and respect Paul Daugherty despite the rather widespread belief that he's nothing more than a lazy hack?

He is a respected columnist in the sports community for the most part. When you say "widespread belief" what you mean is HOF's "can't see past the bridge of his own nose" belief.

The reason I ask is due to my recent visit to the WhoDeyRevolution website.

Oh, you troll there too? :D

In that wretched place Daugherty's firing is being looked upon as a minor tragedy, and some posters have even gone so far as to suggest the eveil overlord, Mike Brown, was behind the move.

Please let this be true.

What a sad, angry man you are. Your true colors really come out here. I'm not even going to say anything else other than I feel sorry, not for you, but for whoever has to unteract with you on any kind of regular basis.

If people want to hate on PD that is fine. Some people like the Tim Sullivan-esque "which difference maker will they sign next" brand of columnist, and some prefer the more honest "well nothing has changed, the Bengals still suck, lets talk about the Reds" brand of columnist. To each their own.

But yours is just plain mean spirited. How are you going to roast PD for 15 years of "lazy writing" and yet tongue Mike Brown's balls every chance you get despite 18 years of ineptitude? You are just another of the few remaining Mike Brown apologists who only allow themselves to remain that way because they are usually so blitzed on game day that it doesn't matter who wins or loses.

Which is fine, the world needs drunken cheerleaders too, but sometimes the men like to read objective analysis, not subjective piss peddled as rain.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Funny you should mention lower legwear. You ought to check out the hype just now...

Wow, you just tricked me into visiting your website, didn't you?

And once there all I find is a picture of Chad wearing pants the same color as the car he drives.

That is so wrong.

I can't help thinking Kirk would never abuse my trust in that way.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
Sign in to follow this  

×