HoosierCat Posted November 18 Report Share Posted November 18 As we head into the holiday season, I would like to wish everyone on this board Happy Holidays, and to the players, coaches and front office of the Cincinnati Bengals, a very Merry Go Fuck Yourselves. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ArmyBengal Posted November 18 Report Share Posted November 18 Annnd here we are back to the old bye week jokes. Let me start. I know it's the bye week, but somehow the defense is still going to find a way to completely fuck everything up and when trying to figure out what happened, Zac is going to say, "We have to find a way to finish, we can't have bye weeks ending like this". 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoosierCat Posted November 18 Author Report Share Posted November 18 I do have to say that the futility of this season is something special. I mean, so far they've lost seven games, only one of which (the Eagles game) has been by more than one score. Hell, two of the games were one-point losses. You would expect that random chance would have bounced their way once or twice, but no. Nope, nope, nope. Every week it's an avalanche and they can't do a thing about it. It has to change next year. Burrow turns 28 in about 3 weeks. They can't dick around for another year or two while they wait for Zac Failor's contract to expire. Joe's prime is now and it's slipping away with every loss. Sigh. But we all know it won't happen... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
COB Posted November 18 Report Share Posted November 18 My recent interview with Mike Cob: “Thank you for meeting with me Mr. Brown.” MB: “My pleasure. Call me Mike, please.” Cob: “Very well, Mike. When I look back on my life, I feel as though I am looking into a dark abyss of space and time.” MB: “Is that a question?” COB: “Do you feel that way? That your life is devoid of all purpose? That nothing truly has any instrinsic value?” MB: “I don’t know. My purpose right now is that big Fresca contract for the stadium.” COB: “You were once known as a bit of a progressive on societal matters. Yet you quietly sat on the sidelines as Ohio has been turned into a gerrymandered theocracy hellhole. Will you spend a high draft pick on another offensive lineman next year? MB: “Uh, yes. We will shore up that line with draft picks. Yes.” COB: “You reside in a mansion. Amongst the wealthiest of our society. Yet you repeatedly drive twenty five miles per hour on Shawnee Run Road in the left lane with your blinker on. Why?” MB: “How do you know about that?” COB: “The other owners are tired of doing all the work while you sit on the sidelines, an iconoclast who does nothing but poke them with a sharp stick. They do the heavy lifting that increases the value of your franchise, yet in your own small way your obstruct them at every turn. Why” MB: “What?” COB “You frequently reference a hypothetical oxcart, and a hypothetical ditch. What is the meaning of this?” MB: “OK! Yes, as the league moves forwa…..” /loudly interrupted by interviewer/ COB: “Is there a god?” MB: “Well, I don’t know for sure. There is the accrual accounting method.” COB: “So, accrual accounting is your god?” MB: “I never thought of it that way. But yes, I guess it is.” COB: “The American Society of Sock Garter Collectors has a god. And you, Mike Brown, are that God!” MB: “Ha ha! Yes, I have a quite a collection of sock garters, and yes most in the ASSGC consider my collection to be the gold standard.” COB: “Why is your sock garter collection not in the Smithsonian?” MB: “It will be. We’ve been quietly negotiating the terms of the loan of my collection to the Smithsonian.” COB: “I’m afraid to ask this question, but I will. How long have you been negotiating?” MB: “11 years.” COB: “The lighthearted portion of the interview has concluded. When will you die?” MB: “Gosh I don’t know. I feel good.” COB: “Do you think you may be immortal?” MB: “Yes, I might be. I’ve thought about that.” COB: “If you are immortal, you will be destroyed by watching your children grow old and die. Will you consider signing some free agents to help in the defensive backfield?” MB: “Gee, I leave all that up to my personnel guys, the scouts and such.” COB: “Is that a no?” MB: “Correct.” COB: “Thank you Mr. Brown, that concludes part one of our interview?” MB: “Part what?” 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoosierCat Posted November 18 Author Report Share Posted November 18 Fantastic work, COB! 10/10, no notes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gregcook68 Posted November 18 Report Share Posted November 18 I just put $100,00 down in Vegas that the Bengals will NOT lose the game in week 12!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
COB Posted November 19 Report Share Posted November 19 Man, Mixon is having a great game against the cowboys. Amazing how good he looks when first contact isn’t behind the LOS. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoosierCat Posted November 19 Author Report Share Posted November 19 9 hours ago, COB said: Man, Mixon is having a great game against the cowboys. Amazing how good he looks when first contact isn’t behind the LOS. 153 combined yards, 3 TDs. On pace for his best year by far even though he missed several games. Bengals bookface broke out into another argument last night, of course. Somehow, I don’t find the comeback that “if Mixon were here he would suck because our oline isn’t built to run block” quite the knockout it’s proponents do. Especially after a game that demonstrated they can’t pass protect, either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
COB Posted November 19 Report Share Posted November 19 When he gets two or three steps he’s a load, not easy to bring down. I enjoyed watching him. It’s fun to see him have success. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
glasgowbengal Posted November 19 Report Share Posted November 19 Just shows what Mixon can be behind a semi competent OL. Highlights what an absolutely horrendous job Pollack has been doing. Is there even one of our OL that would be regarded as top half of the league in their position? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoosierCat Posted November 19 Author Report Share Posted November 19 12 minutes ago, glasgowbengal said: Just shows what Mixon can be behind a semi competent OL. Highlights what an absolutely horrendous job Pollack has been doing. Is there even one of our OL that would be regarded as top half of the league in their position? OBj and Mims are fine. Karras is wearing down but is still serviceable, and Lee behind him is promising. The problem is at guard. Volson is sub-replacement level and Cappa is a shell of his former self, no idea what happened there. Given that we are now down to evaluation time, they should bench Volson, slide Karras to G and insert Lee so we can see if he can be the center of the future. ETA in addition to getting Lee into the lineup I agree with all of Jason’s suggestions here: https://www.cincyjungle.com/2024/11/19/24299897/2024-bengals-season-salvage-wreckage Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoosierCat Posted November 19 Author Report Share Posted November 19 So, what’s the thinking down at good ol’ PBS this week? Seriously, that’s Zac’s plan. Quote “I think we all watch the game and we can see it’s just coming down to one play in every single game,” Taylor said after the game. “So why would you make a big wholesale change? We’re just one play away. Every week. That doesn’t happen. Consistently. Stay the course! Quote And so again, we’re not going to be those people that just panic because the record is 4-7 and we start making all of these significant changes. That’s not what the answer is.” What we’re doing isn’t working and by God we’re gonna keep doing it! That’s the answer! Sigh. Remember, the FO is paying $4.5 million a year for this guy. Through 2026. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
glasgowbengal Posted November 19 Report Share Posted November 19 Two out of the last three years, they’ve blown up the run game during the bye and pivoted to another scheme/style. Jeez, it’s badly needed over the next couple of weeks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoosierCat Posted November 19 Author Report Share Posted November 19 Jets fire GM. Wish we could do that. https://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/42487178/sources-jets-fire-gm-joe-douglas-amid-woeful-season Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ArmyBengal Posted November 19 Report Share Posted November 19 Love seeing Mixon do so well. However, I think it’s more a product of being somewhere new. Demeco Ryans is a hell of a head coach. They have weapons on both offense and defense. However, the Texans O-line is far from stellar. Tunsil is a penalty machine at LT, they have made more than a handful of changes on the interior and benched a first round player as well. They are less than the model of an ideal O-Line. Mixon is just on his game. Happy for him. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoosierCat Posted November 20 Author Report Share Posted November 20 Picked up a db. Quote With two starting cornerbacks on injured reserve, the Bengals are looking at developing their young players at that spot, and on Tuesday they stayed young when they claimed Patriots cornerback Marco Wilson off waivers. Wilson, 25, a 2021 fourth-round pick of the Cardinals, averaged 21 snaps in his 10 games with New England and brings 54 NFL games of experience that includes 37 starts and three interceptions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ArmyBengal Posted November 20 Report Share Posted November 20 No talk of Anarumo’s decision to bench CTB? Apparently he’s fucking up. Pinned both the Chargers first two TD’s on him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoosierCat Posted November 20 Author Report Share Posted November 20 3 hours ago, ArmyBengal said: No talk of Anarumo’s decision to bench CTB? Apparently he’s fucking up. Pinned both the Chargers first two TD’s on him. Well, that’s all in the past now after he cheered real good on the sideline. Quote "Cam is about the right stuff. If he wasn't, then he would've been sitting on the bench, like we've seen other guys that get sat down for a minute, and he would've been moping or pouting," Anarumo said. "He was up cheering like nobody's business. He's about the right stuff. We've just got to get him to settle down." Fire Lou. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
COB Posted November 20 Report Share Posted November 20 11 hours ago, HoosierCat said: So Zac says we’re close, no changes. Mike Brown found his ultimate coach, he’ll be here forever. 11 hours ago, HoosierCat said: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ArmyBengal Posted November 20 Report Share Posted November 20 Glad a prerequisite for earning your way back onto the field when you play like shit and are a main contributor for the loss is to cheer like nobody's business. Nothing says, I've learned my lesson and won't fuck up any more like clapping your hands together. I'm going to have to remember that the next time Mrs. ArmyBengal has a good reason to be pissed off at me. Knowing is half the battle. Thanks Lou !! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoosierCat Posted November 20 Author Report Share Posted November 20 With a tip of the hat to stripes… SMOKE CRACK Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
COB Posted November 20 Report Share Posted November 20 I’ve thought about how much respect Belichick shows the Brown family. If there is one person that could actually make our drafting worse, it’s Bellichick. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TJJackson Posted November 20 Report Share Posted November 20 All of the following need more in-game non-special-team snaps (and yes, Army, I know you think of some of these guys as busts) Browning Murphy Ossai Every single one of the 2024 draft picks, except Mims and those who are injured, and especially Jenkins, Lee, and Burton MOO-MAA Chuck Sizzle DJ Ivey Tufele Money Mac has fallen off a cliff. New nickname: McShank. Love the guy for what he has done for us in the past, but buh bye and sorry. Gonna need to draft a K in 2025 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ArmyBengal Posted November 21 Report Share Posted November 21 No, at this point in the season, they need to be playing these guys. You have to see if there’s any chance in righting the ship. I’m all about it TJ. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ArmyBengal Posted November 21 Report Share Posted November 21 9 hours ago, HoosierCat said: With a tip of the hat to stripes… SMOKE CRACK Yes, any talk of who the Bengals might bring in to replace Zac (They won't) is an absolute waste of time. To start rattling off big names is an even bigger waste of time. Hey, here's an idea... Lets have a conversation about how many top of the market free agents the Bengals are going to bring in during the off season. God knows that's time well spent. I'm banking on at least 3, with a probable trade of Khalil Herbert for Myles Garrett as well. Probably trade our 6th and 7th rounders to get back into the first round too. Fucking stupid... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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