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Bengalszone rehabs T.O.'s image


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he posted a list on my FB account of the best microwave popcorns on the market.

seems insignificant, but it really solved a lot of problems in my house.

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I had just clogged the toilet with a truly massive lunker, and none of my best efforts could get it through the hole. Then out of nowhere, there was Terrell Owens, and he was wielding a black Sharpie marker. He asked me politely to step aside, and I obliged. He then reached into the toilet, and using his Sharpie he cut through my immense turd creating smaller segments which easily proceeded down the hole on the next flush.

Thanks T.O.

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Being Summertime and living in SoCal, I hit the Beach a couple of weeks ago. I was pretty far out and got a terrible cramp in my leg. I screamed for help, and who do you think swam out and helped me back to shore? Nope not a Lifeguard....It was T.O. As he carried me out of the water and layed me on the shore, I said "Thanks T.O. you're a Hero" to which he responded "A good deed is like peeing in your pants. Everyone knows you did it, but only you can feel its warmth"

Man was I lucky T.O. was taping his reality show here.

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I wasn't suppose to say anything about this because it has been classified in nature, but here it goes...

When I was out on mission in Afghanistan our entire unit came under fire from a Taliban insurgent group. They continued to send wave after wave of attackers and we quickly ran out of ammunition. Right as it looked like we were going to all die in place, TO parachuted behind enemy lines and singlehandedly destroyed the entire Taliban offensive.

While unloading on the enemy in a hail of bullets and haze, he could be heard yelling, "YOU FORGOT TO BRING YOUR POPCORN B*TCHES" !!!

Thanks TO !!!

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T.O. probably wouldn't want me to tell this story, but when he finally arrived in Cincy his first stop was at a homeless shelter. He founded a bible study for deaf and blind homeless people, saved all their souls for Jesus, then cried about various things. T.O.'s frickin' awesome.

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I was driving to work early last monday morning (3 am), when out of nowhere there is a large deer standing in the road. Out of the corner of my eye I see a flash of gold. It is TO in one of his batman T-shirts, he manhandles the deer to the side of the road and waves to me as I pass by. I yelled thanks as I passed by slowly , and all I heard him say was, "it looked like a piece was missing, I'm just glad that I could be that piece."

TO, my HERO!!!

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