Funny

[Bengals1]

NOT MINE!

(AP) - CINCINNATI--Following a 51-45 loss to the Cleveland Browns on Sunday, the Cincinnati Bengals vowed to score more points and “get their offensive rhythm going” in order to avoid falling short again next week.

Quarterback Carson Palmer, who threw six touchdown passes, admitted that 45 points is “not going to get it done” if they want to reach the playoffs this year.

“We’ve got to do better. I’ve got to do better,” said Palmer, who threw for 401 yards against the Browns defense. “Right now there is just no rhythm to what we’re doing. It’s time for everybody on this offense to look in the mirror. Putting up 45 against a division rival is not going to get it done. We’ve got to average at least 50 to stay in these games. And we’ve got to be accountable, because that’s helpful for some reason.”

Palmer acknowledged that the Browns defense played well, but felt his team suffered from a lack of execution.

“You have to tip your hat to the Browns defense,” he said. “They played extremely well. That being said, I think the biggest problem was our execution. Even though I threw six touchdown passes, I still feel like I had a sub par performance. Well, I definitely had a sub par performance because we lost. But don’t give up on this offense yet. We’ll turn it up eventually and score 50, 60 points a game and then maybe start eking out a few w’s.”

The Bengals defense allowed 51 points to the Browns, but Palmer would not use that as an excuse for the embarrassing loss.

“We let up 51 points. So what? We can’t use that as an excuse,” Palmer said. “The guys on that defense are busting their asses out there. I thought they actually made some huge plays to prevent it from getting really out of hand. They’re only serious flaw, if you can call it that, is that they’re a little confused out there. That’s not their fault. It’s the coaching staff’s fault. Actually, they’re confused, too, so maybe it’s the front office’s fault.”

Despite the lackluster performance of the offense, the defensive players refused to call them out after the game. Instead, they took the high road and claimed that both units were equally responsible for the loss.

“You can’t lay it on the offense. They’re doing the best they can out there,” said cornerback Johnathan Joseph. “Maybe they’re pressing a little, but that’s natural when you’re under so much pressure to perform. Of course, we could have let up four or five fewer touchdowns and probably taken some pressure off them. Hopefully we’ll be able to do that next week. Who are we playing? Seattle? Oh. Those guys have a good offense. Our only hope is that they’re involved in some sort of point shaving scandal.”

Prior to Sunday’s game, the Browns had been 2-12 against AFC North opponents under Romeo Crennel, a fact that made the loss even more embarrassing for the Bengals.

“These guys just do not win division games,” said receiver Chad Johnson, who had 11 catches for 209 yards. “They’ve been the whipping boys for the past few years, so for us to come in here and lay an egg against them is pretty embarrassing. And the sad part is that the defense put us in a position to win it in the final seconds. Well we all know whose fault this loss is: Carson Palmer. If he didn’t blow it on that last play we would have won that game. I’m surprised the defense is even talking to him. It just shows what professionals they are.”

[Stripes]

[BengalszoneBilly]

So he is in essence saying unless the Bengals score 50-60 points per game, we still might just "eek" out some wins!?! Are you f**king kidding me!?! That nothing short of sad. I wish he'd ball up, become a total team leader, (not just offense) and lay into exactly where the problem lies. He know it's location. He just won't say and will instead choose to cover for the weak link in the team by scoring more points.

[Bengals1]

So he is in essence saying unless the Bengals score 50-60 points per game, we still might just "eek" out some wins!?! Are you f**king kidding me!?! That nothing short of sad. I wish he'd ball up, become a total team leader, (not just offense) and lay into exactly where the problem lies. He know it's location. He just won't say and will instead choose to cover for the weak link in the team by scoring more points.

Please don't make me embarrass you by pointing out that was a parody.

[BengalszoneBilly]

So he is in essence saying unless the Bengals score 50-60 points per game, we still might just "eek" out some wins!?! Are you f**king kidding me!?! That nothing short of sad. I wish he'd ball up, become a total team leader, (not just offense) and lay into exactly where the problem lies. He know it's location. He just won't say and will instead choose to cover for the weak link in the team by scoring more points.

Please don't make me embarrass you by pointing out that was a parody.

Oh... ...nevermind.

[Bengals1]

Oh... ...nevermind.

It's okay, its been a tough week for all of us.

[HairOnFire]

"They’re only serious flaw, if you can call it that, is that they’re a little confused out there. That’s not their fault. It’s the coaching staff’s fault. Actually, they’re confused, too, so maybe it’s the front office’s fault.”

Pretty funny how the author perfectly captured this message boards reaction to the game in less than 40 words.

[DC_Bengals_Fan]

Oh... ...nevermind.

Hey, props for the Gilda Radner reference!!!

The sad thing is, after a loss like that you can read parody and not immediately identify it as such - the game itself was a parody of the NFL. That's the frightening bit.

[CJBestInAFC]

Want to see what is really funny. Check out this Espn right up for the Bengals vs Seahawks game.

Why To Watch

How can you not watch to find out if the Cincinnati defense actually shows up this week? They were embarrassed in a road loss to Cleveland last week. Seattle is also coming off a disappointing road loss. Both of these teams need to get tougher up front, so look for both to come out and try to feature their running games.

Cincinnati QB Carson Palmer is coming off a 401-yard performance and will face a Seattle defense that was torched last week by Matt Leinart. This is another opportunity for the NFC to try to take a game from what is supposed to be a very good AFC team.

When the Bengals have the ball

Rushing: The Bengals run offense is fine. The problem is for whatever reason they don't seem to want to run the football. Starting RB Rudi Johnson had only 23 carries last week. He has been extremely productive when he carries the ball and we look for him to be closer to the 30-carry mark this week if the game is close. One way the Bengals can take pressure off their terrible defense is by trying to control the clock. Johnson is a powerful, inside runner so look for the Bengals to focus their running game between the tackles this week.

The Seahawks are very thin up front right now and struggled to stop the run last week in Arizona. They miss DT Marcus Tubbs (IR) and are small at DT with Chuck Darby and Rocky Bernard. MLB Lofa Tatupu has continued to be a tackling machine, but has not been nearly as consistent as two years ago when he was a rookie. Part of that reason is that he is not getting protected up front by his DTs.

The Bengals looked soft last week and Marvin Lewis would like them to find their toughness and that has to start up front with Johnson getting more touches.

Passing: Lost in what was a terrible defensive performance last week was that the Bengals, even without WR Chris Henry, are still one of the most explosive offenses in the NFL. Palmer has clearly entrenched himself as the third-best QB in the NFL behind Tom Brady and Peyton Manning.

Seattle is much better this season in the back end with new safeties Deon Grant and Brian Russell and their presence allows defensive coordinator John Marshall to be more creative with his defensive calls. Seattle will move OLB Julian Peterson around in this game looking for mismatches. Seattle will find one where Peterson's speed can put a lot of pressure on LOT Andrew Whitworth who had his hands full with Cleveland's LB Kamerion Wimbley last week.

Also look for corners Marcus Trufant and Kelly Jennings to get physical early in this game. The Seahawks have better range at the safety position this season, which will allow Trufant and Jennings to come up and try to re-route Chad Johnson and T.J. Houshmandzadeh. Seattle will be aggressive in this game and try to put pressure Palmer, who had all day to throw the week before.

When the Seahawks have the ball

Rushing: Not so long ago Seattle had one of the most-feared running games in the NFL, but that has not been the case to start this season. RB Shaun Alexander could not get on track last week in Arizona but that should change this week versus a Cincinnati defense that is consistently out of position and does not tackle. After a tough loss last week, we look for the Seahawks to get back to running the football this week.

Seattle is excellent at running the ball off tackle and Cincinnati's safeties, Dexter Jackson and Madieu Williams, took some awful angles last week in trying to bring down Cleveland RB Jamal Lewis. MLB Ahmad Brooks was also out of position on numerous misdirection run plays last week. Cincinnati will have also have problems with its lack of size at ends with Robert Geathers and Justin Smith. Seattle will take advantage by running the ball to the weak side to match-up LOT Walter Jones and Smith. That matchup will be pivotal in the Seahawks' ability to run the ball. The best way to beat a great offense is to keep them on the sideline. Seattle would love to get Alexander 30 or more carries in this football game.

Passing: Seattle QB Matt Hasselbeck continues to be one of the most efficient quarterbacks in the NFL, but there just does not appear to be much big-play spark in the Seahawks' passing offense. The offense will be somewhat limited in the passing game again this week because D.J. Hackett is sidelined with his high ankle sprain.

Look for more of a controlled passing attack again this week because Seattle does not want to get in a shootout with the Bengals. Seattle will run the ball early, which in turn will open up its play-action passing game versus a Cincinnati secondary that could not cover anyone last week. Seattle will also try to get their No. 1 target Deion Branch matched up on Johnathan Joseph, who was torched last week in Cleveland.

Cincinnati tackled poorly last week, so look for the Seahawks' West Coast offense to throw more off three- and five-step drops to get the balls in the hands of their playmakers, who should be able to make some plays after the catch. Seattle has a huge advantage in this area, but they must be careful because it does not want this game to be a shootout.

Special Teams

Not only was Cincinnati poor on defense last week, it carried over to its special teams, which once again were awful in their coverage units. Two weeks ago Baltimore return man Ed Reed took one to the house and Cleveland kickoff return man Josh Cribbs broke loose for some long returns last week as well. So, Seattle should be able to consistently start drives in good field position versus their coverage units who don't hit, don't tackle and are consistently out of position.

Both teams have excellent kickers in Seattle's Josh Brown and Cincinnati's Shayne Graham. However, the wind can get a little tricky in Seattle, so we give Brown the nod this week. Cincinnati has the better offense this week and Seattle the better defense. This game could come down to special teams where the Seahawks have a huge advantage

I didn't know Ahmad Brooks played that much in that game. Just like a dumb Espn analyst, did you even watch the game. If you did you would have seen Ahmad standing on the sidelines after the first play.

[ShulaSteakhouse]

Yep, 3rd best QB in the NFL, and they're still not looking like a playoff team 4 years into his reign as a starter.

I guess if we had Odell then they'd be in 1st place all year long?

[HairOnFire]

Rushing: The Bengals run offense is fine. The problem is for whatever reason they don't seem to want to run the football. Starting RB Rudi Johnson had only 23 carries last week. He has been extremely productive when he carries the ball and we look for him to be closer to the 30-carry mark this week if the game is close. One way the Bengals can take pressure off their terrible defense is by trying to control the clock.

Wow, talk about missing the point. The score in last weeks game dictated the Bengals all but abandon the running game late in the 3rd quarter....making the remark about not wanting to run the ball rather dubious. I'm sure the Bengals would have lept at the chance to take pressure off the defense by killing the clock, but you can't do that when you're down by two scores and playing a version of hurry up football for the entire final quarter.

[JoePong]

Yep, 3rd best QB in the NFL, and they're still not looking like a playoff team 4 years into his reign as a starter.

I guess if we had Odell then they'd be in 1st place all year long?

There's only been one game this year that they have not looked like a playoff team. And there has been one week where they have looked like a playoff team. Talk about a premature statement.

[ShulaSteakhouse]

Yep, 3rd best QB in the NFL, and they're still not looking like a playoff team 4 years into his reign as a starter.

I guess if we had Odell then they'd be in 1st place all year long?

There's only been one game this year that they have not looked like a playoff team. And there has been one week where they have looked like a playoff team. Talk about a premature statement.

Sure it might be premature, if this team didn't look like the same one we've seen the last 3-4 years (8-8 - lose one, win one, look terrible one week, great the next etc..,).

We'll see how it shakes out I guess, but, I'm not holding my breath.

[DC_Bengals_Fan]

Wow, talk about missing the point. The score in last weeks game dictated the Bengals all but abandon the running game late in the 3rd quarter....making the remark about not wanting to run the ball rather dubious. I'm sure the Bengals would have lept at the chance to take pressure off the defense by killing the clock, but you can't do that when you're down by two scores and playing a version of hurry up football for the entire final quarter.

That was a national article, wasn't it? I think those blurbs are often written by people who just skim the box score and come up with something to write.

Other thing is, unless you're actually running more plays, running the ball doesn't help rest the defense more than passing - just because the clock's running between plays doesn't mean the defense gets more rest. Just shortens the game.

[bengalsfansince68]

Other thing is, unless you're actually running more plays, running the ball doesn't help rest the defense more than passing - just because the clock's running between plays doesn't mean the defense gets more rest. Just shortens the game.

Wow, talk about missing the point?

Running the football absolutely does give the defense more rest.

Shortening the game is the objective.

Do the math. Go three and out on 3 incomplete passes and the defense is back on the field in a bout 30 seconds of clock time.

Run the football effectively and the clock continues to run leaving less time for the defense to wear down.

I could be wrong, but I'm not!