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Billybroome ........ R.I.P


Scottishbengal

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Billybroome dies and because of various "indiscretions" when upon the earth he gets sent to Hell.

After a few weeks the Devil decides to check up on how BB is settling in, the gauges of his firey cell are set at 40% humidity and +25degrees C. Billy appears to be in his element, wearing a tshirt and shorts - "this is just like an Arizona spring day" he tells Satan, who isn't amused.

The gauges are re-set and BB is left to stew for a couple more weeks at 80% humidity and +32degrees C. When Lucifer checks back in on him Billy is happy as anything, shirtless and happy, "this is just like a late June day in Alabama".

Satan, mightily unimpressed, re-sets the dials again this time at 90% humidity and +40 degrees C. After three weeks Billy is still not concerned, down to his boxers and still smiling he says "this reminds me of being in Mexico in August!".

The Devil, now totally pissed off twirls the gauges in anger and storms out. He returns next February where he checks the dials which are showing 95% humidity and minus 52degrees C. He looks in through the door only to find Billy skating across the floor and kissing every icicle he can and yelling "woooo hoooo, the Bengals have finally won the Superbowl!"

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Billybroome dies and because of various "indiscretions" when upon the earth he gets sent to Hell.

After a few weeks the Devil decides to check up on how BB is settling in, the gauges of his firey cell are set at 40% humidity and +25degrees C. Billy appears to be in his element, wearing a tshirt and shorts - "this is just like an Arizona spring day" he tells Satan, who isn't amused.

The gauges are re-set and BB is left to stew for a couple more weeks at 80% humidity and +32degrees C. When Lucifer checks back in on him Billy is happy as anything, shirtless and happy, "this is just like a late June day in Alabama".

Satan, mightily unimpressed, re-sets the dials again this time at 90% humidity and +40 degrees C. After three weeks Billy is still not concerned, down to his boxers and still smiling he says "this reminds me of being in Mexico in August!".

The Devil, now totally pissed off twirls the gauges in anger and storms out. He returns next February where he checks the dials which are showing 95% humidity and minus 52degrees C. He looks in through the door only to find Billy skating across the floor and kissing every icicle he can and yelling "woooo hoooo, the Bengals have finally won the Superbowl!"

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

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I saw this thread and was like WHAT???

How do you think I felt! I was thinkin' what does that whacked out Scotsman know that I don't! :P

Just goes to show the fun you can have when there's a bottle of good Scotch Whiskey at home! ;)

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Sorry for any confusion (or worry) folks - it was just me spreading a wee bit of glee through Bengaldoom.

Billy, I'm sure, is indestructible!

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In the aftermath of Billy's untimely death, I am sure his widow needs two things

1) Money - burial, coffins, etc etc do not come cheap

2) Alcohol - this is a terrible loss for humanity as a whole, but think of his poor widow. She will need drinks for toasts, and to calm her nerves and take the edge of the intense grief she must be feeling

so - in sum - we should all begin sending large quantities of cash and booze to Billy's address.

Its the least we can do. the very least.

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Rumor has it Billy's widow immediately cashed the life insurance check and purchased breast implants.

"He would have wanted it this way."

My wife seemed to think that was funnier than I did. I need to keep an eye on her now! :blink:

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