BengalszoneBilly Posted October 14, 2004 Report Share Posted October 14, 2004 It's better to think they're going to lose, that way if they win, it's that much betterI sort of do the same thing when I take a girl out for a date. I just get it set in my mind that there is no way in the world that this beautiful young lady I'm out with would possibly even consider having sex with a geek like me! THEN, if the planets align, and the impossible happens and she DOES sleep with me...well no one is more surprised about it than ME!! I'm happy as hell...She feels that she did me a really big favor by giving me the "Mercy F**k"...everybody goes home a winner!! I honestly don't think too many folks around here are having to trick themselves into thinking the Bengals might lose any game they play so they're not too disappointed. The way things are in reality takes care of that for them! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barbarian Posted October 14, 2004 Report Share Posted October 14, 2004 I sort of do the same thing when I take a girl out for a date. I just get it set in my mind that there is no way in the world that this beautiful young lady I'm out with would possibly even consider having sex with a geek like me! THEN, if the planets align, and the impossible happens and she DOES sleep with me...well no one is more surprised about it than ME!! I'm happy as hell...She feels that she did me a really big favor by giving me the "Mercy F**k"...everybody goes home a winner!!Mercy f**k?!?!?!!?!??!?! I remember one time about 5 years ago I had sex with this fat chick. She was trying to nail me every which way including sideways before I finally caved. Hey, I figured since she was drooling so bad for it--I figured it might be good. Well, it wasn't sooo bad after I turned off the lights, but before the lights went out, it was a nightmare-ish event--I mean, having to dodge fatrolls, having to use flour..., jiggling bodyparts that weren't supposed to jiggle--etc.But it wasn't so bad. Anybody seen "Rescue Me" on FX with Denis Leary???LOL!!!!!!!Oh come'on. Everyone's had that dark sexual moment. I just had ballz enough to reveal mine to everyone on here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BengalBobNC Posted October 14, 2004 Report Share Posted October 14, 2004 TMI Barb, TMI Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BengalNation1281 Posted October 15, 2004 Report Share Posted October 15, 2004 YAY!! sex stories!!!The only good story that I have about that is that I slept with my friend's mom when I was 18. I had come across a journal-type entry that she had written on her computer about how bad she wanted to nail me, so one night I wanted some sweet love and she was more than willing to give up the cakes. I lost a friend over it when she eventually found out, but she(the friend) was scuzzy anyway, so I didn't care.I'm so romantic why did I just share this with everyone? Oh, yeah, still picking the Bengals 23-10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BengalszoneBilly Posted October 16, 2004 Author Report Share Posted October 16, 2004 The only good story that I have about that is that I slept with my friend's mom when I was 18. I had come across a journal-type entry that she had written on her computer about how bad she wanted to nail me, so one night I wanted some sweet love and she was more than willing to give up the cakes. I lost a friend over it when she eventually found out, but she(the friend) was scuzzy anyway, so I didn't care.I'm so romantic Dude...your stock just went up BIG TIME with me!! The loss of a friend is a small price to pay for a juicy memory like THAT, scuzzy or not! And Barb, as far as these comment of yours:Well, it wasn't sooo bad after I turned off the lights, but before the lights went out, it was a nightmare-ish event--I mean, having to dodge fatrolls, having to use flour..., jiggling bodyparts that weren't supposed to jiggle--etc.All I can say is "Been there, done that, and to be brutally honest, I'll probably do it again. I know me!Ya know...fat chicks are the equivelent of amusement park rides for adult men! They're a whole lot of fun to ride until one of your buddies see you on it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BengalBobNC Posted October 16, 2004 Report Share Posted October 16, 2004 And one time, at band camp I stuck a.....Nevermind! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BengalszoneBilly Posted October 16, 2004 Author Report Share Posted October 16, 2004 And one time, at band camp I stuck a.....Nevermind! Aww c'mon Bob! I'm sure all of us here would love to hear where you stuck your "oboe"! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BengalBobNC Posted October 16, 2004 Report Share Posted October 16, 2004 Aww c'mon Bob! I'm sure all of us here would love to hear where you stuck your "oboe"!I played tuba! Yeeeouch!!!!Oh come'on. Everyone's had that dark sexual moment.Nope, nope, nope, ain't gonna tell, my lips are sealed, Mistress Victoria, I'm not saying anything, nope, nope, nope!Oops! Did I just have a Mr. Subliminal moment??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BengalszoneBilly Posted October 17, 2004 Author Report Share Posted October 17, 2004 Holy s**t. When the hell did I start this thread? It appears I must be logging on to the forums while sleep walking during erotic dreams! That might explain the rrrrrrrrecent problems with my keyboarrrrrrrrrrrrd keys sticking! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
B24 Posted October 17, 2004 Report Share Posted October 17, 2004 Holy s**t. When the hell did I start this thread? It appears I must be logging on to the forums while sleep walking during erotic dreams! That might explain the rrrrrrrrecent problems with my keyboarrrrrrrrrrrrd keys sticking! The posts were a part of another thread that got extremely off-topic. I split the thread into two different threads. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BengalszoneBilly Posted October 17, 2004 Author Report Share Posted October 17, 2004 The posts were a part of another thread that got extremely off-topic. Ya think? I kinda figured that's what happened. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Uula Bear Posted October 27, 2004 Report Share Posted October 27, 2004 The only good story that I have about that is that I slept with my friend's mom when I was 18. I had come across a journal-type entry that she had written on her computer about how bad she wanted to nail me, so one night I wanted some sweet love and she was more than willing to give up the cakes. I lost a friend over it when she eventually found out, but she(the friend) was scuzzy anyway, so I didn't care.I'm so romantic Hahahaha, that's so funny. A few years ago I was at this party and my friends mom was there and when the party died down she started hitting on me...I tried resisting, but what can I say...I'm a guy. I caved and gave it to her good. She was a MILF too. My buddy never found out and I don't think he ever will. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ackley1 Posted October 29, 2004 Report Share Posted October 29, 2004 I sort of do the same thing when I take a girl out for a date. I just get it set in my mind that there is no way in the world that this beautiful young lady I'm out with would possibly even consider having sex with a geek like me! THEN, if the planets align, and the impossible happens and she DOES sleep with me...well no one is more surprised about it than ME!! I'm happy as hell...She feels that she did me a really big favor by giving me the "Mercy F**k"...everybody goes home a winner!!Mercy f**k?!?!?!!?!??!?! I remember one time about 5 years ago I had sex with this fat chick. She was trying to nail me every which way including sideways before I finally caved. Hey, I figured since she was drooling so bad for it--I figured it might be good. Well, it wasn't sooo bad after I turned off the lights, but before the lights went out, it was a nightmare-ish event--I mean, having to dodge fatrolls, having to use flour..., jiggling bodyparts that weren't supposed to jiggle--etc.But it wasn't so bad. Anybody seen "Rescue Me" on FX with Denis Leary???LOL!!!!!!!Oh come'on. Everyone's had that dark sexual moment. I just had ballz enough to reveal mine to everyone on here. You should have just gotten a BJ. Fat girls give the best BJs, because that's all most guys let them do. I will admit that I have caved in for a few chunky chicks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ackley1 Posted October 29, 2004 Report Share Posted October 29, 2004 I went on a date with this hot ass girl one night that I met at a club a couple nights before. So I met her at her her at her dorm room on a Sunday afternoon at William & Mary and we went on a walk. Now this was a sweet little girl and I really didn't think there was a chance in hell that I was going to get in her pants on the first date.When I first got there she told me that she was planning on going to church that night and she wanted me to go w/ her. I talked her out of that so we ended up going to the ice cream shop. So I'm sitting there w/ this hot ass girl eating ice cream thinking there is no way I'm getting ass. I mean she wanted to go to church on our first date and now were sitting at a f**king ice cream shop. That doesn't sound like a date that ends w/ getting laid, but this girl was sooo hot!So we walk around the campus for awhile and then she suggests that we go hang out in her room because the mosquitos were getting bad. So we go to her room and we popped in Pulp Fiction. Now this was a good sign because for some reason whenever I watch Pulp Fiction with a chick I end up getting ass sometime during the movie....I don't know wat it is. Well, by the time Marcelus was gettin pounded by the cop, I was already nailed this chick and left. I don't know how, but to this day she STILL is the hottest girl I've ever nailed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Uula Bear Posted October 30, 2004 Report Share Posted October 30, 2004 You should have just gotten a BJ. Fat girls give the best BJs, because that's all most guys let them do. I will admit that I have caved in for a few chunky chicks. hey...that's right...I don't know why I never realized that. I hooked up with this big girl after a night of drinking. To this day nobody has ever slobbed my knob as good as she did, nobodys even come close, and she's the only chubs thats given me a knob job. I'm retarded, why didn't I ever put that together. Later guys...I'm gonna go find me a whole lotta woman tonight Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jditty47 Posted October 30, 2004 Report Share Posted October 30, 2004 i have never slept with a fat chick and never will. I have what some guys call standards. I feel that im worthy of a good looking chick so thats all i accept. sorry for some of u guys Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BengalszoneBilly Posted October 30, 2004 Author Report Share Posted October 30, 2004 i have never slept with a fat chick and never will. Jditty...life is full of many different things, each of which provides you with a different experience! To say "never" with a (how can I say this nicely?) girl who's greatly challenged by gravity(?) is depriving yourself the variety that life offers everyday!It's almost the same as when you were in Amsterdam, but imagine this time, instead of trying some of their biggest, fattest, and stickiest buds, you just asked for a small, dried out, underweight ripoff bags of bogus overpriced dirtweed, where the only buzz you get off of it is the one from the lack of oxygen due to the 20 minute coughing fit it induced!And just to set the record straight, nobody "sleeps" with them! Too dangerous! If she rolls your way...GAME OVER! You're just another greasy spot in the sheets! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BengalszoneBilly Posted October 30, 2004 Author Report Share Posted October 30, 2004 Well, by the time Marcelus was gettin pounded by the cop, I was already nailed this chick and left. You definitly want to be gone by time this unholy part of the movie rolls around. If she happens to have some "toys" laying around, this scene in the flick just may put the wrong damn idea in her fruity little head, and the next thing you know SHE wants to do the drivin', if ya know what I mean!! (and it's nothing remotely to do with car keys!!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scottishbengal Posted October 30, 2004 Report Share Posted October 30, 2004 There was this sheep once. Well, more than once to be honest. It was a really pretty sheep.God, it gets soooo lonely up here in the mountains. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BengalszoneBilly Posted October 31, 2004 Author Report Share Posted October 31, 2004 There was this sheep once. Well, more than once to be honest. It was a really pretty sheep.God, it gets soooo lonely up here in the mountains. I like having you around Scotsman. Anytime I start feeling the like I'm the planet furthest out there orbiting the Sun, you'll post something like this which slings me right back into the middle of our "solar system!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BengalszoneBilly Posted October 31, 2004 Author Report Share Posted October 31, 2004 I have what some guys call standards. Really jditty? I see these high "standards" that you claim to abide by don't extend too far beyond women, because if you applied them to other things in lifes pursuits, as in to say, a consistently high level of quality performance from your football team, that alone would exclude you from being a Bengals fan now wouldn't it?I'll just come out and say it to make sure you get my point. If you looked at all the NFL football teams individually as a certain type of "women," based on good record=good looks and vice-versa, I think the Bengals just might currently be the proverbial "fat chick" of the NFL!And what makes it all that much sadder is that we guy's here keep showing up with a stiffy, year after year after year, with the same ol' bag of flour to roll her in, just looking for that one good ride! I hope this helped in putting some perspective on all of this for you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jditty47 Posted October 31, 2004 Report Share Posted October 31, 2004 hahahahaha good point, but im still not gonna bang a fatchick...i just feel sorry for them and want them to succeed in life, otherwise drop a hundred fitty pds and get alot of surgery Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BengalszoneBilly Posted October 31, 2004 Author Report Share Posted October 31, 2004 hahahahaha good point, but im still not gonna bang a fatchick That's probably for the best. Them large ladies would probably just end up hurtin' most skinny ass guys anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ackley1 Posted November 1, 2004 Report Share Posted November 1, 2004 hahahahaha good point, but im still not gonna bang a fatchick...i just feel sorry for them and want them to succeed in life, otherwise drop a hundred fitty pds and get alot of surgery Well, I've never banged a fat chick but I've had a few chunky ones. Nothing wrong w/ a little chunky. Dude every guy lowers their standards sometimes. Don't tell me you never have. That's what alcohol is for. It helps so see the beauty in women. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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