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Mean Marvin makes Chad cry again...


HairOnFire

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I thought about dumping the following C Trent article into one of the already existing Chad threads, and then I reminded myself that if I didn't start a new thread somebody else would. So in the interest of saving time....

C. Trent Rosecrans

Lewis: 'Chad's not getting moved'

Tuesday 04-21-2009 12:15pm

Even though T.J. Houshmandzadeh said on the NFL Network that his former teammate Chad Ochocinco has been calling him 'crying' in hopes of being traded from the Bengals, Marvin Lewis said Tuesday the team will not trade Ochocinco.

"Again, I don't know why people continue with this speculation of moving Chad," Lewis said. "He's been told many times and reiterated now -- and I don't know if anyone's keeping count of this -- but Chad's not getting moved. So we won't speculate on any of our players"

Lewis said he didn't see a receiver in the draft that could replace Ochocinco, nor would the fact the Bengals drafted two receivers in the first three rounds last season.

"I think we still have some room to compete and you're going to carry a glut of those guys and if we can get a guy who can help us and have some upside, that would be helpful," Lewis said.

As far as if a receiver picked early would impact Ochocinco's status with the team: "No," Lewis said. "I don't think we're going to pick a guy who is better than Chad, I haven't seen that guy yet."

Lewis said he expects to pick a receiver somewhere in the draft, to go along with Ochocinco, Laveranues Coles, Jerome Simpson, Andre Caldwell, Chris Henry, Antonio Chatman, Mario Urrutia and Maurice Purify.

"Receiver is a position, that I don't know if any team goes through the draft and doesn't draft a wideout, so I'm sure there will be at least 32 receivers taken by 32 teams, so chances are we'll take a wideout at some point in the draft as well," he said.

* And as a style note, the Bengals said they will, like the league (and Reebok), refer to the receiver by his legal name, Chad Ochocinco.

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"He's been told many times and reiterated now -- and I don't know if anyone's keeping count of this -- but Chad's not getting moved. So we won't speculate on any of our players"

Hopefully that's code for, "We are trying very hard to rid ourselves of this f*cking assh*le and are willing to take a granola bar in trade".

Seriously though, as much as I want him gone, we will be forced to see how this charade plays out again all season long...

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I consider Lewis's remarks to be confirmation of what I've been saying for a couple of weeks now. That being, the Bengals have no interest in trading Chad this year and haven't been talking trade with any other teams. Of course others will read the remarks and despite the lack of evidence see it as proof of the Bengals trying desperately to move Chad but are now resigned to keeping him due to the poor offers they've gotten. And still others will read the remarks and immediately start coughing from the imaginary smoke they've just inhaled. I can almost hear the chants about how "It's still on!" But as for me, I take Lewis's remarks at face value. Chad's staying.

That said, IMHO the most depressing thing Lewis said had to do with drafting yet another WR in the coming draft, including a refusal to rule out selecting one early, and the joke about Zimmer not being needed in the warroom due to the high probability this will be a predominantly offensive draft.

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willing to take a granola bar in trade

Well, there's the problem - half a granola bar might do it, but a whole one?

Sorry I should have specified. I was talking about the plain ones, not the good ones with chocolate and snickers bars crushed on top, making them even more healthy !!!

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Chris Henry: I want to be a Bengal again

Hair: There's no way this cretin will be a Bengal again

Marvin: There is no way this cretin will be a Bengal again

Hair: I consider this a validation of everything I said!

Son-of-a-Genius: Everyone, please welcome back Chris Henry! I just re-signed him! He is redeemed!

Marvin: *dead silence*

*time passes*

Chad: waaaaaAAAAAAAAAAA

Hair: We won't be trading Chad for anything shy of a 1st and a third, probably more like 2 firsts

Chad: waaaaaAAAAAAAAAAA

Hair: so I really dont think we'll be trading Chad

Marvin: There is no way we will be trading this cretin

Chad: waaaaaAAAAAAAAAAA

Hair: I consider this a validation of everything I said!

Note: movie rights to this script remain available. Minimum bid is half a granola bar, and not one of the ones with yucky dried fruits and nuts.

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Chris Henry: I want to be a Bengal again

Hair: There's no way this cretin will be a Bengal again

Marvin: There is no way this cretin will be a Bengal again

Hair: I consider this a validation of everything I said!

Son-of-a-Genius: Everyone, please welcome back Chris Henry! I just re-signed him! He is redeemed!

Marvin: *dead silence*

*time passes*

Chad: waaaaaAAAAAAAAAAA

Hair: We won't be trading Chad for anything shy of a 1st and a third, probably more like 2 firsts

Chad: waaaaaAAAAAAAAAAA

Hair: so I really dont think we'll be trading Chad

Marvin: There is no way we will be trading this cretin

Chad: waaaaaAAAAAAAAAAA

Hair: I consider this a validation of everything I said!

Note: movie rights to this script remain available. Minimum bid is half a granola bar, and not one of the ones with yucky dried fruits and nuts.

Not an apples to apples comparison.

With Henry, it was obvious that Marvin wanted nothing to do with him, and that Mike Brown overruled him.

In this situation, Marvin would be the first to want to let Chad go... but it sounds as though Mike Brown is refusing to let him go.

Perhaps Marvin has learned from the Henry situation not to speak his mind at a press conference, and rather speak Mike Brown's mind.

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Seriously though, as much as I want him gone, we will be forced to see how this charade plays out again all season long...

Raise your hand anyone if you DON'T know how this charade is going to play out.

Yeah, I do. What's the over/under for dropped passes this year for OchoFredo in a Bengals outfit? Let's start the bidding.

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Chris Henry: I want to be a Bengal again

Hair: There's no way this cretin will be a Bengal again

TJ Jackson: Everyone knows Hair is my sweetie. As for the Chris Henry thing...he's not my type..

Marvin: There is no way this cretin will be a Bengal again

Hair: I hope TJ Jackson isn't as gay as he seems. I really don't have time for another stalker.

*time passes*

Son-of-a-Genius: Everyone, please welcome back Chris Henry! I just re-signed him! He is redeemed!

Marvin: *dead silence*

Hair: Well, that sucks.

TJ Jackson: I'm sorry, did someone just ask for me?

Hair: *dead silence*

*time passes*

Chad: waaaaaAAAAAAAAAAA

Hair: We won't be trading Chad for anything shy of a 1st and a third, probably more like 2 firsts

TJ Jackson: Hair is still my sweetie, but that Whur Chad At guy is beginning to start a fire in my pants.

Hair: I hope you two will be very happy together. BTW, do you have an opinion about Chad?

TJ Jackson: Well, I guess he's cute enough but he's not my type.

Chad: waaaaaAAAAAAAAAAA

*time passes*

Hair: so I really dont think we'll be trading Chad. All of the rumors we're hearing are just writers talking to other writers.

Whur Chad At: You're wrong. They have to trade him...because he's sad and unhappy. (sniff) But they'll only get a 4th round pick in return.

Hair: But if that's all they'd get why would they trade him?

Whur Chad At: *dead silence*

*time passes*

TJ Jackson: I like pudding.

Hair: Of course you do.

*time passes*

Marvin: There is no way we will be trading this cretin

Hair: Told ya' so

TJ Jackson: I still like pudding.

Whur Chad At: And I like the way you stroke my hair, TJ.

TJ Jackson: And I like the way you always smell of crayons. It makes me feel young again.

Chad: waaaaaAAAAAAA

*time passes*

Chad: waaaaaAAAAAAA

*time passes*

Chad: waaaaaAAAAAAA

*time passes*

Chad: waaaaaAAAAAAA

*time passes*

Chad: waaaaaAAAAAAA

*time passes*

Chad: waaaaaAAAAAAA

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Drop a few "but there's the rub"s in there and you're in business.

We all have our quirks, ehh?

For example, Shank and you often write fruit filled roll ups...due to your reluctance to accept comparisons of apples to oranges and oranges to apples.

And of course any post from Army is likely to include some mention of someone being kicked in the nuts.

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hat said, IMHO the most depressing thing Lewis said had to do with drafting yet another WR in the coming draft, including a refusal to rule out selecting one early, and the joke about Zimmer not being needed in the warroom due to the high probability this will be a predominantly offensive draft.

Hopefully this is a smoke screen :| would like see atleast one defensive player in the first three rounds.

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I'll trade Chad for an washer machine, seriously get this guy outta here

Agreed...! I cant believe this idiot may still be around...!

He's a pu**y who talks tough (wont go over the middle without his alligator arms). He thinks he's cool with the media, yet, never says anything clever, rather sounds like a non-creative 12 year-old punk desperate for attention. He's selfish, he never worries about how his actions (demanding a trade/talking crap about his teammates and team) or inactions (playing like sh*t, a.k.a. - not blocking or completing routes if his as* is not primary/dropping balls and being a pu**y over the middle/td celebrations, no matter the score and drawing a penalty) affect the rest of his team.

Is anyone else tired of pieces of sh*t like this in sports? Are u fu**ing kidding me with this mother fu**er...?

How many times have you heard Carson (or any other teammate) say he WANTS Chad to stay in the past year (I don't want to hear TJ)...? Carson is your leader and QB and he doesn't even want him and we are talking about a WR...? What does our idiot Brown not understand here?

This is such an obvious addition by subtraction, it's just not even funny. I seriously have no clue why this fu*king absolute "new generation I am the coolest" hunk of gold-tooth sh*t is still around...!

A washing machine would be a blessing for him, maybe I could wash myself in it after this post. I have been here a long time and I don't think I have ever inferred such language as I have here. Unfortunately, I think I'd still say he is a piece of sh*t!!

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And of course any post from Army is likely to include some mention of someone being kicked in the nuts.

Hey, "kick to the nuts" posts were normally reserved for Mike Brown and I have since gotten over being angered by something that won't ever change until the Brown's no longer own the team. We could change it up to driving large spikes through the scrotum if the kicking to the groin seemed to juvenile...

Anyway, I've moved on from my anger with that subject and now take it all out on my employees. Good times !!!

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I thought about dumping the following C Trent article into one of the already existing Chad threads, and then I reminded myself that if I didn't start a new thread somebody else would. So in the interest of saving time....

C. Trent Rosecrans

Lewis: 'Chad's not getting moved'

Tuesday 04-21-2009 12:15pm

Even though T.J. Houshmandzadeh said on the NFL Network that his former teammate Chad Ochocinco has been calling him 'crying' in hopes of being traded from the Bengals, Marvin Lewis said Tuesday the team will not trade Ochocinco.

"Again, I don't know why people continue with this speculation of moving Chad," Lewis said. "He's been told many times and reiterated now -- and I don't know if anyone's keeping count of this -- but Chad's not getting moved. So we won't speculate on any of our players"

Lewis said he didn't see a receiver in the draft that could replace Ochocinco, nor would the fact the Bengals drafted two receivers in the first three rounds last season.

"I think we still have some room to compete and you're going to carry a glut of those guys and if we can get a guy who can help us and have some upside, that would be helpful," Lewis said.

As far as if a receiver picked early would impact Ochocinco's status with the team: "No," Lewis said. "I don't think we're going to pick a guy who is better than Chad, I haven't seen that guy yet."

Lewis said he expects to pick a receiver somewhere in the draft, to go along with Ochocinco, Laveranues Coles, Jerome Simpson, Andre Caldwell, Chris Henry, Antonio Chatman, Mario Urrutia and Maurice Purify.

"Receiver is a position, that I don't know if any team goes through the draft and doesn't draft a wideout, so I'm sure there will be at least 32 receivers taken by 32 teams, so chances are we'll take a wideout at some point in the draft as well," he said.

* And as a style note, the Bengals said they will, like the league (and Reebok), refer to the receiver by his legal name, Chad Ochocinco.

We won't get rid of him, we will let him come back this season and kill it and prove that last year's poor numbers were because of Fitzgerald and injuries. Once he puts up 1400 yards and gets 8 tds this year we will get a first for him next season!

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