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HoosierCat

I Give Up

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Well, I'm off to the produce department at the IGA, got my 6 Plus and it has a great camera on it.  Goodbye rat race!

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Well, pickings were slim in regards to potatoes.  Luckily, I found a particularly photogenic clove of garlic.  Should pull in a few hundred thousand, just have to get the right star struck business person over to my house, get them to slug down some Boones Farm, and let the negotiations begin.  

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I need to find someone who combines a massive net worth with a near-retarded intellectual capacity.  If anyone knows any 4th generation members of the Walton family, please let me know.  Also, if anyone happens to know anyone with the last name "Haslem", please contact me immediately.  

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Just used the panorama function on my iphone to photograph an enchanting clump of asparagus.  I'm abandoning the written word, my new art is supermarket produce, and I'm a ***damn superstar already.  

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Free tip for anyone just getting into the high-end produce photography game - The produce guy at the IGA in Granville, Ohio, can be surprisingly militant.  

He also seems completely incapable of appreciating the artistic value of a vinyl laminate background for produce photographs.  AKA the floor.  

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I'm almost at a loss for words regarding the delicate flow, and the subtle, intimate, tone of these organic beets.  My god.    

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The muted, but still coarse, aggressive, texture of this one particular artichoke will bring you to tears.  

All species, all things, have their grandiose, other-worldly specimans.  This artichoke is Beethoven, LeBron James, Leonardo DaVinci, and Jackson Pollock.  

This artichoke is Jesus Christ.  

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