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Shocking Bengal Tiger Attack at Chicago Zoo


BlackJesus

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Shocking Bengal Tiger Attack at Chicago Zoo

Sept 25th, 2005

Jonathan Black

CNN

This Sunday a zookeeper at the Chicago Metropolitan Zoo had "claws" for alarm when he was attacked and raped by a large ferocious Bengal Tiger who had previously been known for the last decade to be docile !!

"It was horrible, just horrible," sobbed a middle aged man who was one of many who were unfortunately an eyewitness.

The Bengal Tiger, named "WhoDey" intercepted and attacked zookeeper Kyle Orton as Orton entered the cage to give him dinner. Whodey who certain Zookeppers had been warning others was going to be very dangerous in coming weeks, lunged at his throat, goring him with his huge claws and razor-sharp teeth. Some of the claw marks were three-quarters of an inch deep, but Orton kept coming back for more.

Then, astonished onlookers could "bearly" believe what happened next--WhoDey began to brutally rape zookeeper Orton!

Frantic zookeepers rushed for rifles as others tried to divert the Bengal Tiger, "Butt" there was no stopping WhoDey! This Tiger kept "bearing" down and Orton just had to grin and "bear" it!

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This was Kyles first year as a ZooKeeper at the Chicago Metropolitan Zoo,

and many of his colleagues talked about how great he was with the animals,

especially the Lions... That is why the attack came as such a suprise to some.

ZooKepper Orton was pronounced dead upon arrival at the Chicago Medical Centers hospital. A full quart of Tiger semen was extracted from his ruptured chest cavity.

WhoDey's 17-inch phallus, armed with guard hairs as sharp as red-hot needles, shot through Ortons' rectum, shattered his lower spine and skewered his colon, causing his entire lower torso to cave in!

And can you imagine Ortons' surprise when WhoDey's putrid ursine semen flooded his ruptured chest cavity?

Finally, zookeeper Eric Smith shot WhoDey with a tranquilizer gun and pulled WhoDey from the cage. The unconscious Bengal Tiger was later transfered to the Carr Zookepping facility near Houston Texas.

"I have worked with dangerous animals before," zoo director Kate Urlacher said. "But never have I seen any animal sexually assault a human being like that before."

Meanwhile, Orton was pronounced dead at an Chicago area hospital--but at least he died grinning and "bearing" it!

courtesy of BlackJesus - feel free to di"semen"ate at your own wish

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Judging from the performances so far, that doesn't seem all that far fetched or homerish at all BJ. The Colts defense is bound to come down to earth when they play offenses better than Baltimore, Jacksonville, and Cleveland. The Chiefs should lose some games in that division, and the Patriots don't look like the power they once were.

I see the number one seed coming down to the Bengals, the Colts, and the Steelers. If we win the division, we may very well get that homefield advantage.

Here I am talking about that three games into the season. I better not end up eating any crow later.

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