Bipolar The Titan Posted July 1, 2006 Report Share Posted July 1, 2006 We all know what happened to Ben - some busted teeth, a lot of blood, and a good chewing out by Bill Cowher. But what would've been the outcomes for other NFL quarterbacks in this situation? Here's my theory.Drew Bledsoe – He would have come under scorching criticism from Terrell Owens.Eli Manning – Archie would have intervened and forced Philip Rivers to get on the motorcycle.Donovan McNabb – He would have come under scorching criticism from Terrell Owens.Mark Brunell – He would have thanked God for giving him that wonderful experience and would have tried to baptize the driver of the car.Brett Favre – He would have received enormous national coverage and sympathy, and then participated in minicamp the following week, throwing seven interceptions.Brad Johnson – Nobody would have noticed.Rex Grossman – This is a trick question, because Grossman wouldn’t have been on the motorcycle. He would’ve been at a surgical clinic having arthroscopic surgery.Josh McCown – Matt Millen would’ve traded for a wide receiver to replace him.Chris Simms – People would’ve thought he was Brad Johnson.Michael Vick – The media would be commenting on how he face-planted spectacularly, and no other quarterback could’ve done it.Drew Brees – He would’ve been traded or cut because, hey, when you’ve got Reggie Bush you don’t need any other players.Jake Delhomme – He would have survived and been okay, but people would credit Julius Peppers for saving him.Alex Smith – He would’ve secretly been grateful for missing the 49ers’ season.Matt Leinert – He would’ve dropped drastically on the draft chart amidst rumors that he can’t take a hit.Matt Hasselbeck – He would’ve been embarrassed, because five seconds before the crash he would have predicted that he would beat the car.Marc Bulger – (Long silence). I got nothing. There’s not a single thing about Bulger that’s interesting.J.P. Losman – He would’ve overshot and missed the car completely.Daunte Culpepper – Three years ago, he would have crushed the car and kept on going. Now, he would be injured and the driver of the car would have ended up with everything he was carrying.Chad Pennington – He would’ve been injured. Duh.Tom Brady – Angels would have descended and saved Tom from harm, and then after the other car stopped, Tom would have climbed into the back seat and given the driver a neck massage to calm her down.Steve McNair – He would have walked it off, because Steve McNair is tough, man. He’s really tough. Everyone would have been talking about how tough he is.Carson Palmer – Kimo Von Oelhoffen would have been ticketed for an illegal left turn.Charlie Frye – Trent Dilfer would take over the team, win a Super Bowl, and then get benched when Elvis Grbac decided to come out of retirementPeyton Manning – During his first year back, the NFL would institute a special rule that nobody is allowed to touch Manning, and he only has to say the name of a receiver for it to count as a completed pass.Vince Young – Pfft. As if anything could hit Vince Young...Byron Leftwich – He would’ve been okay, but Fred Taylor would have been hospitalized with sympathy pains.David Carr – He would’ve been fine. He takes harder hits than that every Sunday.Trent Green – If you think that car would’ve made it past Willie Roaf and Will Shields, you’re crazy.Aaron Brooks – Al Davis would fire Art Shell.Philip Rivers – Nobody knows…nobody has any idea at all.Jake Plummer – He wouldn’t have hit the windshield at all, because Broncos only hit in the back. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stripes Posted July 1, 2006 Report Share Posted July 1, 2006 I love the Dilfer one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bengalboomer7 Posted July 1, 2006 Report Share Posted July 1, 2006 I like the Bulger and Manning one Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlainThePain Posted July 1, 2006 Report Share Posted July 1, 2006 The Jake Plummer one reminds me of the Tony Williams incident. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smackdown625 Posted July 1, 2006 Report Share Posted July 1, 2006 I like the Vick one....and the Eli Manning one is pretty good too Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChadJohnson-85 Posted July 2, 2006 Report Share Posted July 2, 2006 I like the Vick one the most. And I also like the Steve McNair one aswell. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Who? Posted July 2, 2006 Report Share Posted July 2, 2006 Haha, this was posted on DawgTalk, that's good stuff. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bipolar The Titan Posted July 3, 2006 Author Report Share Posted July 3, 2006 the comment about dawgtalk got me thinking so I ran this search..http://search.yahoo.com/search?p=%22He+wou...eb-t&dups=1"He would have come under scorching criticism from Terrell Owens"^ http://www.pcloadletterwtf.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=2705check out this thread^ ... What a tool! The guy that posted it at goTitans doesn't like me...or else I'd ask him if he wrote it.You must admit the Steve McNair and Vince Young entries arebiased for Titans fans. That's why I put that quote box on it.http://www.bigsports590.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=980this forum got a hold of it as well...I've posted this on at least two other forums myself.There are replies in there that indicate it has been emailed around. I hope you enjoyed it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jjakq27 Posted July 3, 2006 Report Share Posted July 3, 2006 Excellent stuff. I am disappointed that there isn't a Jon Kitna reference. Perhaps he would have fumbled the bike due to his small hands. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bipolar The Titan Posted July 4, 2006 Author Report Share Posted July 4, 2006 Excellent stuff. I am disappointed that there isn't a Jon Kitna reference. Perhaps he would have fumbled the bike due to his small hands.ya know, I reposted a thread from here on the colfreaks forum. It was the Goldie The Tooth thread. I loved that smack return in post #8. Chip. Those guys have been talking about you. Some regard you as the the frontrunners to win the AFC. Imagine that. Shocked the hell out of me. See, I'm picking Denver to win it all and I was talking to coltfreaks about AFC champs and what not and all the focus turned to Cinci. I've chosen to bring you this content because this is what I do. Sure, I'm a smack clown and all that but basically I am a troll, but I'm no flaming troll or anything like that. I'm a Titan fan. I'm a good troll and a REAL Titan fan. Now, if troll is a super hard core dirty word here like it is at theHogs.net, then no, I am not a troll at all. I'm just a legit poster that hits ALOT of forums. I'm pretty sure I'm not going to get run out on a rail here so I'd like to post that link to the thread entitled "Broncos...tell it like it is" ... oh, and they told... (also, some of the replies by me were taken from the Broncos forum and pasted in. I had a thread there that was veiwing, but since the focus shifted to Cinci, I thought your membership might enjoy reading the replies...haha never. That team is not even close to as talented as us our the bengals. The Bronco's just can't get it done in the playoffs with jake plummer, you wanna talk about a guy who can't preform in the playoffs?? Manning takes way more abuse than he should when guys like Plummer get let off scott free.Cincy. The Bengals are very very strong and well coached. I've been reading that Palmers recovery is actually going really well, if he is ready to go they will no doubt be the front runners.The bengals scare the hell out of me. I think they could be the best team in the league next year if Palmer is ok and that young D is at least decent.haha are you trying to say the things people say about manning aren't true? Wake up, the guy can't win when he needs too. Its almost a cliche but hear me out. Peyton has won big games before like the divisional in KC or even the pats game this year but he changes as a player when he plays those games.Everytime we play a game where our season is on the line Peyton seems like he loses trust in all his players around him and tries to do everything himself. He panics, starts calling wrong plays at the line and making even worse reads and trying to force the ball into spots he wouldn't normally throw to.I can't believe your trying to defend Peyton in this situation, I was once like you. I once believed that it wasn't peyton and that he will do it one day and prove everyone wrong but that changed this year.your forgetting he threw the season away this year to polamalu and it got overturned in what was the worst call in the history of the challenge.their defense doesn't really have a ways to go, marvin lewis is like TD in the fact that they both can take nobodies and turn them into playmakers in a very short time. The Bengals will be a powerhouse take it for what its worth. How can they not be considered front runners? did you watch the colts bengals last year? No one else played us that tight last year and I say that because in that point in the season we were still playing meaningful games unlike the chargers game. They are a solid team.http://www.coltfreaks.com/forum/showpost.p...mp;postcount=56check this guy out^ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stripes Posted July 4, 2006 Report Share Posted July 4, 2006 Good stuff, BtTitan. It's great to see that sort of praise from a team that many people think are in just as good a position to win it all as are the Bengals. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MacD BengalFan Posted July 5, 2006 Report Share Posted July 5, 2006 I think Brett Favre should have read something like this:"He would have withheld comment on any involvement in the accident, waiting until after the accident report was filed and charges were pending before he finally decided that he wanted to do it one more time to see if he still has it." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ArmyBengal Posted July 5, 2006 Report Share Posted July 5, 2006 David Carr – He would’ve been fine. He takes harder hits than that every Sunday.Am I the only one who found great humor in the one with the greatest truth to it ?? Funny stuff !!!WHODEY !!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayaker0678 Posted October 31, 2006 Report Share Posted October 31, 2006 this is so great Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoosierCat Posted October 31, 2006 Report Share Posted October 31, 2006 Excellent stuff. I am disappointed that there isn't a Jon Kitna reference. Perhaps he would have fumbled the bike due to his small hands.No, on its way to the car the bike would have been intercepted by a truck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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