Marvin Lewis, Automated Voice Message God

[dchyde]

Hey,

If you call the main Bengals line (513-621-3550) after office hours, Marvin Lewis himself actually does the "if you want this department, hit 4, if you want to talk to blah blah, hit 3." It's surreal and actually kinda cool and funny that he took the time to do this.

Oh, and of course he ends the message with a hearty "Who Dey!"

[Stripes]

Our Marvin, who art in heaven,

Hallowed be thy Name.

Thy kingdom come.

Thy will be done,

On earth as it is in heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our trespasses,

As we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation,

But deliver us from evil.

For thine is the kingdom,

and the power,

and the glory,

for ever and ever.

Amen.

[ArmyBengal]

TDB, you are sure to incur the wrath of some religious right on this board for that one !!! Well, add me to the list because I thought it was pretty funny !!!

WHODEY !!!

[Stripes]

Good lookin' out, Army.

NOTE:

I mean no offense to anyone in my first post in this thread. I'm just kidding, so I hope it's all gravy folks. Thanks.

[bengalboomer7]

I see a smyting a comin'. On the other hand, it's been awhile since I've been to a good stoning

[Spor_tees]

I see a smyting a comin'. On the other hand, it's been awhile since I've been to a good stoning

If you want to see a good stoning...all you have to do is watch Spain.

[HoosierCat]

I can just hear the latest update to the system now...

"Hi, this is Marvin Lewis, head coach of the Cincinnati Bengals. If you're a player, press one. Otherwise, press two."

(1)

"If you are calling to report a legal issue, press one. Otherwise, press two.

(1)

"If you have been issued a summons for traffic or vehicular violations, excluding ones involving drugs or alchohol, press 1.

"If you have been issued a summons for, or arrested in a case involving, drugs or alcohol, press 2.

"If you beat the crap out of someone and have been charged for it, press 3.

"If you have some hot stereo equipment in your posession, press 4.

"If you just waved a gun at a crowd of people in front of a cop, press 5.

"For anything else, press 6."

[rwalling]

And forgive us our trespasses,

As we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation,

But deliver us from evil.

If ever I saw the theme for this team during this off season!

[The_Next_Big_Thing]

Good lookin' out, Army.

NOTE:

I mean no offense to anyone in my first post in this thread. I'm just kidding, so I hope it's all gravy Folks. Thanks.

TDB, I personally find it a little tasteless, but I understand you didn't mean it badly. Now, had you taken more time to change the words more to be more football appropriate, I wouldn't be offended.

[bengalboomer7]

And I thought I had too much free time on my hands

[Sox]

I can just hear the latest update to the system now...

"Hi, this is Marvin Lewis, head coach of the Cincinnati Bengals. If you're a player, press one. Otherwise, press two."

(1)

"If you are calling to report a legal issue, press one. Otherwise, press two.

(1)

"If you have been issued a summons for traffic or vehicular violations, excluding ones involving drugs or alchohol, press 1.

"If you have been issued a summons for, or arrested in a case involving, drugs or alcohol, press 2.

"If you beat the crap out of someone and have been charged for it, press 3.

"If you have some hot stereo equipment in your posession, press 4.

"If you just waved a gun at a crowd of people in front of a cop, press 5.

"For anything else, press 6."

"For all of the above, press 7."

Fixed.