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Chris Henry's top 10 possible career moves


DDOGG

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Chris Henry needs a new gig.

In case you haven't heard, the Cincinnati Bengals released the party-lovin', bottle-smashing, lawyer-using wide receiver.

As Bengals President Mike Brown said: "Chris Henry has forfeited his opportunity to pursue a career with the Bengals. His conduct can no longer be tolerated."

When your behavior can't be tolerated by the Bengals, that's saying something.

But this guy has talents that reach far beyond pass-catching and getting arrested. So here are Chris Henry's top 10 possible career moves.

Drum roll, please:

10. Pacman Jones' official "wing-man."

9. Garbage collector in the ditches of I-75. Why not get a head start?

8. Chad Johnson's teammate on their new Arena Football League team. One talks a lot and stays out of trouble off the field. The other says nothing except, "Yes, your honor."

7. Jose Canseco's publicist.

6. Phone operator for the Bengals' "jerk line." Takes one to know one.

5. Michael Vick's newest co-defendant.

4. Mixed martial arts, he could star in 6-foot-4, 200-pound, waste-of-talent division.

3. Mail-room employee at the NFL offices. He'll need something to do when he's suspended all of this coming season.

2. Driver for the "Girls Gone Wild" bus.

And the top possible new job for Chris Henry:

1. Wide receiver for the Dallas Cowboys.

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The only problem with the "Dallas Cowboys Receiver" part is that it isn't funny. If the Cowboys or Patriots wanted Mr. Henry he would be allowed in camp tomorrow and be considered a model citizen.

The commissioner hasn't even begun dealing with him yet. He won't see an NFL football field in at least a year IMO.

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