O.M.F.G.

[joseph]

I'm a pretty prentious person. I write something on here and I believe that one way or another it gets back to the person I want it to. So obviously, being prentious, I made it a point to watch Eric Milton's last two starts. Just to see how he'd pitch. I must admit that I didn't see the first inning of both games, and when I watched him he's only given up 1 run. I feel like he's been sucking up some of my karma that I've been saving up for the Bengals upcoming Super Bowl season. Anywho I was watching him and a saw a couple of things that i.m.o. were flawed. The first one was in the rain shortened game. It seems that he was slowing down his delivery on his changeup which kinda served as a bit of a tell. Second was that when he was losing control on occassion because he was flying open too early on the front side. Anywho, I was going to do a second advice column to him, but figured he was going well and it's better that he doesn't bother with such things and focuses more on making "his" pitch. And then the Devil revealed himself as I was listening to the Lance McAllister show. They were commenting about the work he's been doing with the new pitching coach. AND THE THIS DUM MOTHER FU**ER WAS ACTUALLY WORKING WITH HIM TO FLY OPEN IN HIS DELIVERY!!!!!!! I couldn't believe me ears! It was like having a connect the dots puzzle in invisble ink and then of all of a sudden it appears and as clear as day it's a freagin outline of a scaple. O.M.F.G.!!!! I've never heard of a coach actually teaching a player such a fundamentally and tragically awful thing to a player. Now many of you I'm sure have no idea what I'm getting at so we'll do a little at home demonstration. Now let's stand up...Now let's stand up and go thru a mock semi pitching motion keeping you shoulders parrallel through the course of the motion....Now lets do the same thing but instead lets lets violently through open our front shoulder which will drag the back shoulder thru. MMMMM HMMmmm, yeeeeeaaah... Ya feel that tork on your back shoulder there in the second motion. MMMMM, hhmmm yeaaah that's a really bad thing. Coincedently this A-hole is actually teaching players to fly open in their delivery and suprisingly enough half the damn pitchers in the Reds minors end up under the scaple. Huh, imagine that.... A-hole, who iis n charge of teaching young pitchers of the Reds, is teaching them the most fundementally WRONG AND DAMAGING WAY TO PITCH!!! Good one guy.... You're coaching really is something....So as self appointed De Facto GM of the Reds A-hole is being served his walking papers next. I just have to build up my "pimp hand" a little to get this done. In the meantime Mr. Milton you can keep on listening to A-hole who has probably had a significant role in tearing up a laundry list of arms or you can take my, average Joe fan, advice. I'd advise you to immediantly stop working with A-hole, go back to your regular pitching motion and just keep rolling with you current building confidence and to really work on taking your mental focus to another level and making "your pitch" and putting the ball were you want it when you want it. And keep the damn ball down of course. If ya listen to me, I'd say you'll be fine; listen to A-hole and I'd bet you'll end up under the scaple within the year.

I don't really have much time left, but a couple other small notes from the game. Mr. Lopez congratulations on your all star appearance. You really earned it and have played amazingly and I hope you stay a Red for a long time. A small flaw I picked up, and I only mention it because I have really lost all confidence in the coaching of this orginization. It was wet and it could have just a single instance, but when you broke to steal the base when you got gunned during the rain shortened game your footwork on you break was sloppy. It had some wasted motion and a false step, and I pray that someone in that minor league system teaches the proper way to pivot and release when stealing a base, but I'm not too sure anymore... Mr. Adam Dunn, that was one hella of an at bat the other day!!! I was really impressed. It was the one after you hit the homerun after running the count full then fouling some balls off. It was amazing!!! AMAZING!!! You didn't take one swing that I rember and you struck out, but it was a memorable a telling strikeout in your career thus far. The thing that really got me was that you batting eye was spot on perfect. 3 strikes and in all honesty none of them were really a strike. And as the last one sailed down the middle a few inches below your knee, you got pissy with the ump for making a bad call. Your eye was perfect, PERFECT. There is only one flaw that I saw with your approach. YOUR NOT THE DAMN UMPIRE!!!! While someday, if you so chose, I'm sure you will make one hell of an umpire. Just a magnificent understanding and command of the strike zone. Hell they'll probably put you in the Hall of Freagin Fame for your future accomplishments as the greatest umpire of all time. Unnnnnntillll that time though, you're gonna have to understand that all umpires don't have the command of the strike zone that you do. s**t sucks, I know, but you have to learn to hit according to their inferior ability. I'm half chuckling as I'm writing this and it's a lot in jest, but seriously you're eye and disiple is too good at the plate. Seriously for the rest of the season you have to start to learn to hit some of those borderline pitches. Go get yourself a tee a practice hitting balls that are just a little outside, or a little too low, or a little too high. You have got to get into the habit of expanding the your strike zone a little especially with two strikes. I have know doubt that you can pick out those border line pitches either, because I watched you take three pitches that were really close to strike but were just slightly out of the zone. It really is impressive, truly

[joseph]

See I knew he was sucking up my Bengals Super Bowl Season Karma!!!!!!! I watch like four starts in a row he does well... I miss the last two and he gets roughed up. Coincidence... I don't think so!